Open Mic: Bipolar Minds |
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The Law
Site Moderator God of the Minions Joined: 15 June 2013 Status: Offline Points: 5504 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 64-8-8 Form: LNWWWW |
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Posted: 17 December 2013 at 11:49pm |
Manic In a manic state, Half of me's Human Half of Me's Mutant All my Fallacies are Lucid Fighting off All the cavalries moving Casualtys, Wounded, Overcharged Up Committing batteries to em I'm so high I revolve with the planets So crazy and peeled My Resolve is bananas I can feel my mindless chord snapping And Still I wouldn't get bored laughing Cracking, All kinds of Stabbings Right through the core I'm smashing Causing crimes in traffic My Manic mind is havoc So Sharp, and contrasted I have static swords slashing and having More Orgasms Than four whore tappings I was running a whole empire and within 5 minutes I ignited my own trip wire Depression In a drepressive state, My life is a mess, Jesus christ, what I have done with it Having anxiety attacks, barely breathing my lungs slipping Getting strife as wonder whirled my deranged mind Living in hell and the underworld at the same time I want to take my life, how can I commit suicide Should I stab the knife through my heart, its do and die But I'm such a stupid guy, Even satan hated me with cupid's eyes I'd probably survive and fail all my brutish tries End up amputated, alone, with a monotony sac Shitting on myself without a colostomy bag I'm nothing, I'm worthless, Just am miserable fuck Just taking razors to my arm to give it a cut I want to feel pain, I want that portion suffering It's so sick that melancholy is my unfortunate comforting So I decided to sit in the bathtub, and drop the toaster in But I survived it, and the outcome was some roller coaster shit Mixed Episode I fucking love it, Fuck this, I don't why I keep surviving this dumb shit Everything seems so beautiful Well thats disputable, on earth I was never suitable I can be anything I wanted I'm heartless, glorified, doomed, my mind is haunted I need my glory to save me, My euphoria's crazy Man I'm too lazy, I don't amount to shit, fuck being glorious daily I can't do nothing but curl up and cry when this dysphoria takes me I'm so hyped up, I feel evil I want to pick up my eagle and shoot all the people But I will probably miss, to them my bullets wouldn't be lethal I have to end this misery now, shoot at the steeple (temple) days later… A lithium refill.. Got to live through the sequels… |
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Poet on acid
Banned Joined: 13 December 2013 Status: Offline Points: 191 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 0-2-0 Form: LL |
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T_T
So beautiful...I love it.
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Poet on acid
Banned Joined: 13 December 2013 Status: Offline Points: 191 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 0-2-0 Form: LL |
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..fuck i was on lithium...din't work....
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The Law
Site Moderator God of the Minions Joined: 15 June 2013 Status: Offline Points: 5504 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 64-8-8 Form: LNWWWW |
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Thank you.
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Titu
Superior Member Joined: 04 July 2013 Location: 🔥 Hell 🔥 Status: Offline Points: 4522 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 47-19-0 Form: WWWWWW |
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Smh @ poet. Aint this piece deserve some proper feed/appreciation and Props? Smh
Law, really impressive. Good work, man. I really liked the concept.... And it was well executed. Verse complexity was just perfect. Usually, i dont enjoy too complex verses.. I loose interest in them..Verse should not be too simple or too complex imo... And this one was just on that "perfect" line. Enjoyable read, throughout. Thr were lots of sick concepts and quotable bars in that... The best part was the last one, " Mixed Episode". The way you swung the moods, very intertaining and impressive. I got interest in "Human Psychology" so i enjoyed it from its first line to the last one. Lots of props,bro |
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Fuck That Fat smelly cunt Donald Trump, a racist asshole who is fucked in the head.
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The Law
Site Moderator God of the Minions Joined: 15 June 2013 Status: Offline Points: 5504 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 64-8-8 Form: LNWWWW |
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Thanks titu
I appreciate it.
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Poet on acid
Banned Joined: 13 December 2013 Status: Offline Points: 191 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 0-2-0 Form: LL |
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lawl kk law
Loved the set up and just the theme of it, the rhyme really flowed i liked how you Incorporated the multiple feelings in a "bipolar mind" the mixed episodes and depression really spoke to me although they where all VERY good The emotion you put into it really speaks out of the text through the words again LOVED the idea this piece really appealed to me so far the best one i've seen from you .. :) have it book marked
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J504
Banned Joined: 08 June 2010 Status: Offline Points: 5385 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 25-0-0 Form: WWWWWW |
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Solid piece right here, really feeling the concept and you captured the phases quite accurately. The way this flowed in the first set here was so nice. Also ended perfectly, captured the cyclic insanity of the illness very accurately. I really enjoy psych pieces like this.
Skilled drop right here, fam. Stay at it. |
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The Law
Site Moderator God of the Minions Joined: 15 June 2013 Status: Offline Points: 5504 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 64-8-8 Form: LNWWWW |
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Thank you, J.
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Manc
Superior Member Joined: 02 April 2010 Status: Offline Points: 7032 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 82-4-2 Form: WWWWNW |
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Nice!! Love the way you broke it down into sections of what BiPolar is. Great angle to take. Descriptiveness and word usage was on point throughout, and this line below was A1 ......
Man I'm too lazy, I don't amount to shit, fuck being glorious daily I can't do nothing but curl up and cry when this dysphoria takes me Sheer brilliance ere dude |
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-Que-
Standard Member Joined: 22 April 2010 Status: Offline Points: 2745 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 13-4-1 Form: WWWWLW |
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I was reading this in front of the smoke shop the other day. Why don't you do more of this. Your talent for controlling plots and imagery is raw. Shit had me thinkin I was crazy.....cuz we all get in those type of moods where we feel like we dammed if we do or dammed if we don't. Or we just get so fed up with life in general that we willing to entertain the most sinister thought processes. I think this deserves a five star.Bravo Law!
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The Law
Site Moderator God of the Minions Joined: 15 June 2013 Status: Offline Points: 5504 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 64-8-8 Form: LNWWWW |
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Thank You, Que.
I really appreciate it.
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Freeda5thDawg
Standard Member Joined: 19 June 2006 Status: Offline Points: 1324 Crew: Lyricist Inc. Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 5-1-0 Form: WWWLWW |
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Very well written piece. I think the mixed portion of both states is my favorite area but as a whole I really did enjoy how it all proceeded and came together in the end. I think you got a really good grasp of each state of emotion/condition and detailed each verse on point enough for the reader to feel it. A lot of imagery and imagination displayed here. Good job, Law.
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The Law
Site Moderator God of the Minions Joined: 15 June 2013 Status: Offline Points: 5504 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 64-8-8 Form: LNWWWW |
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Thank you
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Foresight
Newbie Joined: 23 December 2013 Location: Atlanta Status: Offline Points: 19 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 1-0-1 Form: WN |
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Damn, quit cutting off your bars! That takes to much away from the first part. That's my only issue. Other than that, very, very well done. That's is until the last part, which was in the scope of your style as presented, fuckingeextraordinary. Respect, I look forward to seeing more of this. Keep elevating.
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H4ZE
Standard Member Joined: 13 July 2013 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 1859 Crew: eNtiTy Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 4-6-0 Form: WWLLLL |
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sick piece right here. Love the concept of it and how it all goes together with the bipolar theme. Dope af keep it up
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The Law
Site Moderator God of the Minions Joined: 15 June 2013 Status: Offline Points: 5504 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 64-8-8 Form: LNWWWW |
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Thank you two. I appreciate it.
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