Open Mic: Part ( A Quiet Place rap)

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   (Verse)
Quiet space
Noise erased 
Silent place  
Voice replaced by thoughts flowin like rhythm
Hurt pacing my Heart like venom
A Father wrecked by the loss in him 
Undead restless a dead man walking
My soul escaping through holes 
Gaping the wound takes hold
Facing a cold foe
Making my blood boil 
Emotions riot coil
If only i could turn back time for my little Joel
But now a new child comes like Noel 
Its a Holy miracle

(Bridge)
Silent night
A violent wind
Holy heartbeat
A sinister rhythm
Unlike a psalm 
Nothing is calm
Unfamliar noise gives cause for alarm

(Verse  2 Father)
Liquid flowing in a bathtub
My heart illuminated like a lightbulb 
Sudden the moths flock to it
Violent vicious
Malicious growl 
I can't allow my heart to be calioused again
Daughter you may be deaf
But your eyes speak volumes 
You say i never loved
But this crack in my armor is for you to hide in
You think i'm hard but my  hugs say scars 
Its a father job to stay scared child has no fear 
I thought of you in that basement there
Pain never replaced you because you're here
You blame yourself but part of human is fault 

(Chorus)
You an I are two souls
Two parts which make a whole
Blood which resides in
A Heart barely pumpin
This life is a  road 
You're my driving determination
You an i are two souls 
But you are Part of what makes me whole

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Ghost Writer Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Newbie Joined: 28 April 2018 Status: Offline Points: 7	Post Options Post Reply Quote Ghost Writer Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Topic: Part ( A Quiet Place rap) Posted: 23 May 2018 at 4:48am
	(Verse) Quiet space Noise erased Silent place Voice replaced by thoughts flowin like rhythm Hurt pacing my Heart like venom A Father wrecked by the loss in him Undead restless a dead man walking My soul escaping through holes Gaping the wound takes hold Facing a cold foe Making my blood boil Emotions riot coil If only i could turn back time for my little Joel But now a new child comes like Noel Its a Holy miracle (Bridge) Silent night A violent wind Holy heartbeat A sinister rhythm Unlike a psalm Nothing is calm Unfamliar noise gives cause for alarm (Verse 2 Father) Liquid flowing in a bathtub My heart illuminated like a lightbulb Sudden the moths flock to it Violent vicious Malicious growl I can't allow my heart to be calioused again Daughter you may be deaf But your eyes speak volumes You say i never loved But this crack in my armor is for you to hide in You think i'm hard but my hugs say scars Its a father job to stay scared child has no fear I thought of you in that basement there Pain never replaced you because you're here You blame yourself but part of human is fault (Chorus) You an I are two souls Two parts which make a whole Blood which resides in A Heart barely pumpin This life is a road You're my driving determination You an i are two souls But you are Part of what makes me whole

spume corrupt Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Superior Member Joined: 27 April 2011 Location: UK Status: Offline Points: 3163 Crew: Lyricist Inc. Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 20-7-1 Form: WLWLLL	Post Options Post Reply Quote spume corrupt Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 24 May 2018 at 7:59pm
	Welcome to LA brother About the written.....I really got caught up in the first couple of lines but I can’t lie, the whole thing fell off beyond that Bottom line is the story didn’t develop and the rhyming lost its way I was mainly confused by the time I reached the end Not all bad though you def have potential to be good Stay up and learn the ways Peace


Vellum Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Standard Member Joined: 07 October 2013 Location: Connecticut Status: Offline Points: 492 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 24-2-1 Form: WWWWWW	Post Options Post Reply Quote Vellum Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 13 June 2018 at 1:15am
	I like the line about the crack in his armor for the girl to hide in. That was dope