Open Mic: suicide note

(quite long)


.....

I think nothing
The head a mix of fumes and void
Invasions of inertia
Filled with the dreams I can't avoid.
Nasal wounds, I'm choking blood
The fluids rise up through the throat
A punctured lung, a shattered heart
The touch of her remains remote.
I swim in clouds of ephedrine
But can't forget her icy hands
My eyes are glazed, a shroud of black
The remnants of a cursed romance.
But when the visions knock me flat
I think of her, a love escaped
Of how she left me, slipped away,
A lifetime spoiled, a conscience raped.
Oh why, oh why, where did I fall,
And flirt with devils of the mind
And then I saw it, in the night,
The note her perfect hand had signed.
Tirades of hate, of love, despair
I sat with shaking limbs for days
My eyes an opaque sheet of tears,
And nothing punctured through the haze.
It comes again, the clench of love,
It strangles lungs and grips the chest
Paralysing, darting bolts,
My tortured mind became obsessed.
The spirits slide out from the glass
And down into my shattered corpse
Straight through my savaged, broken heart
The liver struggles to absorb;
Oh take me God, send lightning down!
And smite this failure to the ground!
Burn my body, char my soul
And bring her near me when I'm found!
Oh how I wish, oh how I lust
For razors savaging my veins,
I'll never touch her, hold her gaze
Condemned to these immortal pains.
Oh then she'll see how much I meant
But couldn't put it into words
Now she avoids, hides from my stares,
Her mood is flying with the birds.
Come down with me, and share my pain!
I want you here inside my arms
Oh baby, what I wouldn't give
To have just one more outside chance.
I damaged you, you ruined me
You cast my soul out to the crows
Oh darling, how I wish you knew
How much I fear these mortal blows.
I had you, let you slip away
Your face will never leave me be
I see it now, in dreams, in glass
When will my love come back to me...
I weep alone, she sleeps afar
Her pretty face is quiet and still,
I'd walk this earth to have her back,
Nobody that I wouldn't kill.
If she desired it, knife to flesh
No limb I couldn't live without
When will she see it, feel this hurt,
That I write this note about.
I leave this, darling, inked in blood,
It spurts from wrists to stain the page
It mingles with my bitter tears,
A lifetime's worth of pain uncaged.
The blood is streaming down my arms
My vision slips, my mind is light,
The knees are weakened, eyes are red
My shattered soul has taken flight.
And as I fall down to the gloom,
My corpse surrendered to the flies,
My darling, how I hope you see me,
Every time you close your eyes.

okay...

This was sick as fuck....frank said it all perfectly....great read bro

the imagery was so detailed...the instant i started reading this, you took me into a different place...and seeing how it wasn't a rap, and more poetry, i immediately shunned away all distractions to focus on this read...and wow, the emotion you express in this was great...the darkness was what really hit me...how vulnerable you are in it, and still able to tell it...the desperation in the words, and the depression of missing something: all of that really struck me...from metaphors, to simple phrases, it was all pieced together perfectly IMO...the vivid vocab used, made it even better...and the story, crazy...the loss of hope, the sadness, the obsession, everything expressed real well...this was great sparta...

Good job bumping this Point........I may never have seen it as it was dropped just b4 my time.