Open Mic: Pill Pops

who always had a problem with a lota extra shoppin gonna

go into the coffin droppin dollars to her offspring.

Working hard to make an offering

asking god to please forgive them, all the credits they’ve been missing,

and my fathers still listing, he’s been drifting he can’t listen.

With his Oxy Gin tales, breathing in becomes diminished

And we’ll sit on Duck Tales til he’s Abolut-ly finished

Sister Acting he’s not there, whoop he’s gone away on business

Least that way it seems he cares, like he’s gone but not good riddance

And she’s wishing that he’d hit us so he’d finally make a sentence

But instead he’s just a fragment, of the man we once envisioned

Even though he’s always there by the night he’s someplace different

When the parents are impaired, guess the kids can’t help but listen.

With oxymoronic warnings from a dad who couldn’t give em.

Live in Oxy ironic failure, now I’m gone. I went with him. 

I liked yur concepts, ya definitely have a rhyme style, what
yur lacking here imo is a smooth flow. Seemed a lil bit
choppy to, the gud news this shud be a pretty easy fix for you.
See what kind of info you can about "internal rhyming mechanics"
And apply what you learn to yur next OM. I see sum real potential
here bro....ima keep my eye out for yur next drop fam