Open Mic: Battle Rap #2

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Schematic View Drop Down

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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Schematic Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: Battle Rap #2
    Posted: 16 November 2014 at 8:59am
My Spits Intrinsic Prepare to meet the True Gore,
More killer Instinct than Fulgore Feasting on Whatever My Tool Bores,
Truth Told Break records with the Fastest Timing,
Its Fake Editors agaist the Baddest Rhyming,
Master mind the Darkest Alliance, meditate While the Planets Aligning,
Whatever you say i'll Object becauase you Whack Soft,
Project My Energy and make the Sun back Off,
Protected by an Army of Dead People, Enslaved and Possessed,
Hey G Step back you have no business Near the Best,
Spit Swords that Rip Cores and Tear Flesh,
You play with dolls while I direct Living Puppets,
Seen the Roughest, Defeat the Toughest and Preach like Prophets,
The Diligent Kraken who lurked in Depths of the ocean now Beams to to Surface,
To Roast your Insignificant Carcass in a Heated Furnace,
Serated blades fire away at rapid Speeds from my Cortex,
Tyranic Speech with rap thats like Reading the Codex,
The only one who has Survived Nuclear Showers and Massive Meteors,
Better Strategize caz your Flows are Flacid and Inferior,
My Flow's Corrosion leveling Fields with Explosions,
Feel the Comotion when I Refuse your Cynical Notions,
Mystical Nation witness A Lyrical Revelation of Biblical Proportions,
Spiritually the Diabolical Trooper Receives Orders From Lucifer,
To Leave you Eliptically floating with Cosmic dust Orbiting Jupiter,
Tempt all At Night then Dissappear whenever a Goon Starts a Fight,
The only one with Shocking Right using the The Moon as a Satelite,
An Intelectual Being who remains silent but You Don't Know Why,
Too much Lies has caused me to View you all with the 3rd Eye,
The type to abhor your ignorance and rather Watch a flock of Birds Fly,
The Rhymes i've Woven are the Type thats Golden,
Peeping Angels while the Skies are Open,
A Mental Omen Teraforming, My fingertips can leave a Gyser Choking,
Advance thoughts merge to leave your Matrix simply Disabled,
Greated by Aliens who said I'm too Artistic with Fables,
A Mythical Stranger walking in and out of Sizling Volcanoes,
Shake my hands and cause Cataclysmic Tornadoes,
These Faking Thugs must be Taking Drugs,
Big talkers Get hit with a Wave of Slugs before Leaving the Ghettos,
My creation lives so there is no need to pull Strings like Geppetto,
Unlike these Trained Intruders I'm Acclaimed by Rulers,
Confuse the enemy with Evasive Maneuvers,
You against me is like a pound of bacon in the Face of Pumas,
Communicate with spirits without the help of Paranormal Psychics,
Composing forbidden scripture thats Totally Frightening, No Mind Tricks,
Eyes are Portals Brightening swallowing your Local Sidekicks,
Mightiest Logical Typist why would any Mortal Fight This?
M name is always Mentioned when they Speak of Niceness
Achieve Wiseness, get busy living beause Dreams are Lifeless,
Love is one of the Most Powerful Remedies,
Inject a Synthesis for Mind healing through the Adorable Melodies,
Under the Heavenlies we make Wonderful Memories...
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Nigma View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Nigma Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 16 November 2014 at 6:37pm
Good to see you're still been writing and elevating. It's also trippy to see the way SvW has influenced our writing. Miss that shit! You been following Logic lately btw?? Lord Sybliminal is now one of the most popular rappers on the planet, that is mind blowing. Anyways, consistent verse here, the combination of solid multies and good word choice blended well. I really liked the living puppets line, stuck with me for some reason. Lots of solid sections throughout, that ending bit was extra nice. Two suggestions for you tho. First, drop the Battle Rap titles and think of something more creative. You have a bunch of puppeteer references in this one so something in that area would have worked well to enhance the piece. Secondly, since you're new to the site I'd really suggest dropping some shorter verses as that'll give people better odds of actually reading the verse and growing accustomed to your writing style. 

This was a nice refreshing read tho man. Hope you stay active and become a valued member of the community.
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Pompus View Drop Down

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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Pompus Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 17 November 2014 at 11:18am
Major props on this man, easy to see you got a firm grasp on the use of sounds and rhythm, I really dug the flow which drove me to keep reading despite the length, also the mix of original and common sayings kept it fresh, nice work, looking forward to more, peace
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