Open Mic: Under The Bridge

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Scotty32 View Drop Down
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    Posted: 06 February 2015 at 10:11pm
From under the bridge, a blurred figure is stirred
stumbling, bumbling and hurt, a slurred word is heard
his knuckles drag and tattered clothes snag
the faint echo bounces back, sounded like 'Fag'
onlookers flee, from the foul creature beyond the tree
laughing with glee as he begins to throw debris
with moans and groans of homophobic overtones
the thrown sticks and stones are breaking bones
survivors start to plea, please wretched beast spare me
the response we see, a flow of filth worse than goatse
with iron nerves, demanding the respect he thinks he deserves
but all to return is vicious insults in full reserves
shocked and appalled, the foul creature recoils from what he's called,
galled and enthralled, the beast retreated and bawled
the next day he returned, vengeful of the hatred he had learned
but still he yearned, for the respect the he thought he had earned
as puberty was slow, more homo rants flow, his bigotry unashamedly on show
blow after blow our wicked beasts bestow and still no remorse from this evil foe
why couldn't the villagers find, the beauty hidden inside his tortured mind
still they declined, his affections un-resigned and his talent left unsigned
with confidence restored, the humours ignored and pitchforks secured
the horde are assured the brutes no-longer welcome among the board


Don't be deceived, the story you heard is an old one indeed
repeated so often, its greeted like tumble weed
The beast may be slayed and the memory decayed
but once again a raid, his kind they invade
The cycle goes on, year after year
Cut off their head and two more appear


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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Rutter knows best Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 February 2015 at 10:16pm
Scotty droppin verses! Wtf. This was surprisingly good and well written. Didn't know you had if in you. Read like some old fable. Multi's flow and narrative were on point. Good to see you flexing on a level ground. Enjoyed this.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Mission Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 February 2015 at 10:22pm
Like rutter said, reads like a fable, or folk tale. This piece is quite obviously about you, and I like the way you described the different issues of the site. The flow was decent considering it's more of a poem than a song, good imagery a rhyme combinations. Would have liked to see more multis but you had some nice flows like

"with moans and groans of homophobic overtones
the thrown sticks and stones are breaking bones"

Good shit scotty stay active and post some more
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote daydizzle89 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 February 2015 at 10:34pm

From under the bridge, a blurred figure is stirred
stumbling, bumbling and hurt, a slurred word is heard
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Liked the Internals in here. Smooth was nice. Came
off a little fablish. Defo liked

his knuckles drag and tattered clothes snag
the faint echo bounces back, sounded like 'Fag'
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Lmfao, still keeping a flow here brothaman


onlookers flee, from the foul creature beyond the tree
laughing with glee as he begins to throw debris
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Like the usage of vocabulary and internals
good shit

with moans and groans of homophobic overtones
the thrown sticks and stones are breaking bones
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Not bad, i with you were to change the breaking
bones to something else. Still nice

survivors start to plea, please wretched beast spare me
the response we see, a flow of filth worse than goatse
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Again, if you were to place a multi on the second
line to match your first. This woulda been nice.
Still flow is good

with iron nerves, demanding the respect he thinks he deserves
but all to return is vicious insults in full reserves
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I liked this, your vocabulary shows and the flow
is still decent


shocked and appalled, the foul creature recoils from what he's called,
galled and enthralled, the beast retreated and bawled
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
damn like the use of multiple rhymes heree. Scootz,
i underestimated you to some degree lol.


the next day he returned, vengeful of the hatred he had learned
but still he yearned, for the respect the he thought he had earned
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
ehhh, not feeling the way this came off my tongue. Still not bad,
still get that fable feeling which fits the content perfectly


as puberty was slow, more homo rants flow, his bigotry unashamedly on show
blow after blow our wicked beasts bestow and still no remorse from this evil foe
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Trolls are that evil brah. Lol, i liked the vocabulary you have giving

why couldn't the villagers find, the beauty hidden inside his tortured mind
still they declined, his affections un-resigned and his talent left unsigned
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
DAMN, nice internels and the you havnt lost me on flow. Good stuff

with confidence restored, the humours ignored and pitchforks secured
the horde are assured the brutes no-longer welcome among the board
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Hey, i did my job here lol.

Don't be deceived, the story you heard is an old one indeed
repeated so often, its greeted like tumble weed
The beast may be slayed and the memory decayed
but once again a raid, his kind they invade
The cycle goes on, year after year
Cut off their head and two more appear
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
hahahahahha


Overall Scootz, Much respect on a response. I give you lots of props. Your flow, vocabulary and
the content were all pretty good brothaman. Like i said before, this is all for fun.
You should write more often Scootz

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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Titu Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 February 2015 at 11:17pm
.. My man venting it out today...lol

 This was a well written piece. Ive read your previous stuff aswell and Im pretty confident this was by far the best from you.  Some funny shit right there lol

Talking about the flow,  it was smooth during the most of its parts. Verse was straight forward and I liked it. Glad you actually shit on these kids aswell lol
 Cheers bro...
Fuck That Fat smelly cunt Donald Trump, a racist asshole who is fucked in the head.

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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Brotha Goose Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 February 2015 at 11:14am
Yo Scoot I'm going to be real with you. Your internals were on point and I loved the flow. Story line was solid and your vocab is deep, but where are those Multis fam??? I think if you got that multi game together you'd be an OM beast! Good shit scoot, when you get the time drop some more of your work and get that multi game crack'n!
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Major Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 February 2015 at 3:49pm
My favourite line was the one about beauty inside the tortured mind. It just stood out to me immediately. Like the others above I was feeling the internals, they really helped the flow while keeping the content rich. I like the deeper verses cause it's harder to find flaws in something more personal or whatever. Only thing that seemed like it didn't fit was the goatse reference haha.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Exoduzt Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 February 2015 at 2:21am
Yeah scoots!...Its about time i saw some work from you.  I liked the descriptiveness and the imagery you had packed into this.  This had an extremely poetic vibe to it.  You got some skills scoots.  I also love how you hit the topic.  Trolls will be trolls.

drop more work

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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Zinaii Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 February 2015 at 3:34am
Lmfao!!!! Not only was the timing of this perfect....it was dope as hell. Scotty got a little style down lol im impressed man I mean you took an idea of a typical troll and used it as a metaphor throughout the verse thats not easy man. You had some inners to...wtf scotty lol just random but very nice
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Dougysnuggy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 February 2015 at 7:43am
This was actually dope Scotty. Haha. Last time I saw you drop a verse it was wack. But this was dope. You actually got some decent internal rhymes, and not to mention you really flexed your vocabulary in this. You should try to use more metaphors within these lines , because you're already establishing other literal devices . At least , if you continue to drop. Shit. You could probably beat anyone here. And that's fact. No argument about it. You're the best there is. Keep at it.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Smoothtung Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 February 2015 at 1:50am
Dope dope drop Scott. I didn't see your name so from the title of this I thought you was ant from rhcp
Imagery so vividly intrinsic you might miss it..
Though you never even had the chance to witness it
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Scotty32 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 February 2015 at 8:34pm
Thanks for the feed everyone. Like titu said, I was just venting, tryna put out a message.

I'll try an work on my multi's next time though.
Great and Glorious Supreme Presidential Leader of the People's Democratic Republic of LA
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote barrybondz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 February 2015 at 8:38pm
This is the second piece of I've seen of Scotts and it was just as good as the first one. A nerd daydreaming about a girl or something like that if I recall? Overall smooth internals. Seems like Scott can be a bit of a story teller when he wants to be. To be perfectly honest this is one of the best om drops I've read in a while. 
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (1) Likes(1)   Quote Ransom Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 February 2015 at 9:05pm
This was funny shit, and the flow was actually pretty decent. Props to you Scotty.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote JBrenn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 February 2015 at 12:21am
thats closer was straight fire Scooter!!!
 Really that blew me away... the meta there was Vet status.... the whole verse was ok and you know your just venting and getting this out so i can't really criticizes the product to much. Other than maybe making the whole thing flow as smoothly as the closer did.... but thats really it... whole thing was pretty dope and a good message!
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Hackusation Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13 March 2016 at 12:26pm
This was an amazing write and I was captivated beginning to end, this is the epitome of quality!  It flowed so smoothly. Again, beautifully written piece. Truly worthy of the 5 star rating!
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