Open Mic: Happy Thanksgiving |
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Who-Is-You?
Groupie Joined: 03 October 2017 Status: Offline Points: 89 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 2-0-0 Form: WW |
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Posted: 23 November 2017 at 5:23pm |
I'm thankful that I still have my life even if I'm never going to pre-vail
Still, for my life I'm thankful .. even after wasting years on a disloyal female I feel degraded every day that I go to work but hey my bills are paid, consider it .. So, I'm thankful for my job, even tho I'm underpaid and they treat me like I'm ignorant Can't seem to figure it. How I wanna live. A rolling stone, alone, can't find a plan but i'm still thankful that i'm not homeless, although essentially, I kinda am never see childhood friends or family, although every so often, somebody text me and it's mostly me being distance, so i'm thankful that at least they don't forget me I've always had problems. Yeah i've seen some crazy shit in life. It's stressing i keep it to myself. But I'm thankful in the midst, I've got to help others. That's a blessing All I have out here is "me". I need my body to work properly for this hard labor so for my health, for my strength so i can work my life away for that I'm all thankful I meet a lot of people. If they're good people, I befriend a lot of people I'm thankful I've found balance and became genuine through good and all of the evil If i ever seem discontent just know that my mind is forever spinnin I'm so thankful for the drive I've recieved and will percieve until the ending There's a lot of shit that i would change. And I've been feeling kinda down here recently But I do admit, throught the groosome shit, I'm still so grateful and very thankful, for being me |
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Crimson Juice
Site Moderator Joined: 20 December 2015 Location: U.K. Status: Offline Points: 3258 Crew: Lyricist Inc. Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-11-0 Form: LLWLW |
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This had an uplifting quality etched within,the layering effect was nice as it aided
the depth you brought along,this had highlights to boot too,the general theme of kicking your way through shit and prevailing was nice,and knowing the mistakes you made gave a sense of aweaness which was also a solid inclusion,you also incorporated a subtle vibe via the emotional slant,(these are all highlights for me), i felt like i could draw and relate with the contents and subject matter to a point,& those i didn't mirrow,i could pool from still,what held this piece back in my opinion, (and this is only my opinion),is fluidity,yeah you had this content wise,but flow wise it seemed towards the end to dip some,not that it hampered this verse much with that typed,it was just noticeable,anyways nice piece props for the read too..peace. |
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"You need to learn how to make an exit,
before you can dare make an entrance". |
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LiL Nigga
Newbie Joined: 29 November 2017 Status: Offline Points: 5 |
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this depressed me, u got dat cuck vibe about u
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Endeavor
Senior Moderator Wiggle wiggle said the bun that jiggle Joined: 03 April 2009 Location: Your kitchen Status: Offline Points: 10000102 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 5-4-0 Form: WWLWLW |
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Either post constructive feedback or don't post anything at all.
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#Bananas
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