Text Battle Archive: [FTSS] Ridley Squat v Daydizzle89 [0-1] |
Post Reply |
Author | |
Ridley Squat
Street Team Joined: 20 November 2015 Location: UK Status: Offline Points: 830 Crew: Tha Syndicate Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 9-6-0 Form: WWWWLW |
Post Options
Likes(0)
Posted: 29 October 2018 at 4:05pm |
The battlers are in charge of agreeing upon a topic: Poverty Is A State Of Mind
All battles against other contenders must be tagged with [FTSS] Best of 5 votes wins Due dates = End of the month! 16 line limit* -Every OM feedback after battle is posted increases line limit by 2. (Max = 32 lines) -Every vote on the Battlefield after battle is posted increases line limit by 4. (Max = 32 lines) -Plus Power-ups (wooo!) May the Jammiest Fucker win. |
|
|
|
daydizzle89
Superior Member Joined: 23 July 2014 Status: Offline Points: 3805 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-11-0 Form: LWWLLW |
Post Options
Likes(0)
|
I walk pass a pot of gold and take what i can
Left over butts, cut the filter and smoke the fag Dinner is now a must, i head over to the local trash grab in deep and get myself some beer soaked snacks I live in Colorado though, so its easy to get some dope nd hash Fuck a bowl, all i need is some tinfoil nd dabs So what if im broke, happiness is all i ever had You can be sad with boatloads of cash you can be mad poor and still crash when your family dies Built an empire where i reside when tragedy smiles i live on the streets but super happy with life This cant be, you must be lavishly living in denial Exactly, you tied success with money that you cant buy though I have nothing yet everything that would make you suicidal i live life with no gold while your driving a Ferrari witha blindfold Take it all away and we know that your pride broke I live a lifestyle of survival If you lost it all, your mind would spiral outta control Your entitled, Just dont think that im not human Class warfare is tribal like the drums of music My primal thoughts are dialed in and im not losing Im not a mutant nor am i spiteful for you consuming I just live life broke and success is an illusion |
|
Ridley Squat
Street Team Joined: 20 November 2015 Location: UK Status: Offline Points: 830 Crew: Tha Syndicate Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 9-6-0 Form: WWWWLW |
Post Options
Likes(0)
|
But she had lots of these philosophies when slayed on wine And it's ironically not lost on me ... she stayed at mine ... while I worked extra hours just to pull our weight combined! And though it bothered me, this sophistry, I ain't inclined ... ... to argue once I've gazed inside those hazel eyes! Yes, she taught me lots of things about embracing life ... like, you gotta play some hands before they raise the blinds So the day I lost my job, I said 'Hey babe, it's fine!, It's just another feature of that Great Design!' But her frown was deadly thunder, then she found her ex's number and was down inside his hummer ... without say'n goodbye. 5yrs later. As the days go by, you couldn't say that fate's been kind Now I'm living up that vagrant life, down at Riverside and Eighty-Five I saw her once; a face reminding ... me of another place and time I gestured to her ...... but in my out-stretched palm she placed a dime. Bitch. |
|
|
|
Crimson Juice
Site Moderator Joined: 20 December 2015 Location: U.K. Status: Offline Points: 3258 Crew: Lyricist Inc. Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-11-0 Form: LLWLW |
Post Options
Likes(0)
|
This vote has been accepted by a moderator. Dizzle. I liked the concept you came with here,a tale of the opposite side of the coin to opulence,you had some nice imagery crackin' also,rummaging through the dumpster and expressing delight at its contents like it was fine dinning was in my opinion a cool angle,(food is food at the end of the day),but what struck me the most was the inner strength to the character here,a guy who's in a bad place but still smiles through adversity,and moulds the world around him to suite him- self,and continue to smile in the process,i liked the moral stance that exquisite items are just a luxury and not a tool to survival,this verse was creative in that it gave a lot to the reader,just a straight forward no fuss piece.. Rid's. Yeah your expression on the topics take was also solid here,and your tale was more in the vein of love/poverty,having it all and then losing it all vibe,& as your character found out,love alone isn't enough,especially when it's a one sided affair at that,from opening to end this verse kept me engaged,your certainly a creative fucker when doing topicals,and it doesn't surprise me anymore seeing you do em since IC2,and doing them well may i just add,i felt the overall mechanics with in were ripe really,a twist here and there (especially the ending) was nicely done,a bit of a heart wrenches via the imagery is what my take is,nice verse. Overall a solid battle here and definitely closer than your last meeting (BAE),i kiked both offerings here for different reasons,Rid's with he's machines & story progression, and in truth slightly more creative in that department also,but Dizzle's verse offered more via he's character,plus he incorporated a depth via he's contents,cuz it remained linear,it that its centred around the now,(where Rid's had a start middle and end),plus i felt his tale had a more to draw from engaging story,solid tussle guys.. Vote..Dizzle...peace. |
|
"You need to learn how to make an exit,
before you can dare make an entrance". |
|
Crimson Juice
Site Moderator Joined: 20 December 2015 Location: U.K. Status: Offline Points: 3258 Crew: Lyricist Inc. Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-11-0 Form: LLWLW |
Post Options
Likes(0)
|
Win Dizzle,due to this sitting around,I've now closed and awarded the win to Dizzle..
|
|
"You need to learn how to make an exit,
before you can dare make an entrance". |
|
Post Reply | |
Tweet
|
Forum Jump | Forum Permissions You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot create polls in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum |
|