Identity crisis: IC Round 2: Battler 3 vs Battler 6

battler 3

Battler 3 - was an interesting take on the topic, I kind of expected a story running up to you finding out...like the "is she, isn't she" type thing so it was interesting you focused purely on the aftermath. I also really liked the format of your verse...the letters broke it up & brought in the both sides of the story thing, contrasts with one of the other battles I read in this round where the structure was bit too complex and went in too many directions. I thought you approached it in a real mature way. It was quite subtle actually that you said "love Steve" every time and then just "Aimee"

Criticisms, I think I'd react a bit more passionately / angrily to finding out about an affair!! It would've been cool if you'd built that emotional turmoil into the style of the exchanges...it was all kind of clean & factual where you could've put more raw anger at the start that dissipates over the course of the exchange (because obviously you get the passage of time between which let's heads cool)...that's a high level skill to be able write that into a verse though & I did really like the way you ended it..simple and effective.

Battler 6 - interesting again, not really what I expected from the verse...thought it'd be he confusion and turmoil of being "the other man" rather than actually being caught in the act. Kind of the opposite of Battler 3. You had a real smooth writing style and I liked the way you told the story, was good details but progressed the narrative.i thought that passionate love / masterful rush was an epic set. Mountainous beings was a dope metaphor too.

Criticisms, I didn't really believe the start of your story...you seem to be a random guy who notices this woman around with her husband & you approach her and she throws herself at you? I think it would've been a whole lot better way into the story if you already knew her in some capacity & you could've built off that in terms of he turmoil (the obvious one would be like, fuck it's my best friends wife or something like that)...and the ending was pretty obvious too. Don't get me wrong I did like the way you portrayed it...lots of detail on the romancing and then change of pace, means it was abrupt...so the approach matched the content, which I do look for added extras like that. But ultimately I think this was a pretty basic story that was written / executed well. I would've liked you try to take it into an unexpected / intriguing direction from a conceptual POV.

So yeah...this is a really difficult one to vote. In one aspect they are both a little bland (though nothing technically wrong) and in another aspect they are really strong. I think 3 had a really strong interpretation of the story & delivered conceptually in the way he wrote it. From a technical perspective, it was clean but a little bland...could've been brought to life a bit more. 6 was the exact opposite, I think he did a really good job of bringing a bland concept to life through strong writing technique and the way he told that story.

Not sure if I'm allowed to vote TIE. If I am then I absolutely would vote it as a draw.

If not, then I'm going to go for 3 on the basis that I think he showed more originality and wrote something more unexpected. But good job to both...I enjoyed both verses.

Battler 3  - You started out well, jumping right into the climax of the story, as I got into the wifes response the story died down. I thought it would pick back up at some point but it stayed very mellow, Not much emotion came from either character in such a serious situation. Kind of made the read boring..

Well this was cool. Deff many ways to approach this topic and I like what both did. #3 verse I felt was real creative. Had a great feeling to it. Everything flowed nicely. Your story was filled with emotions and the way you made the situation suck for the husband was impressive for me. What a bitch the wife is imo. #6 I felt started off slow and kept it simple then the story started to pick up I liked the finisher as well but I didn't feel as much emotion as I did in your opponents verse. I liked how battler 3 just got right into. Felt his approach was more clever. This is a close one but I got 3 edging this one being a but more creative.

Vote battler 3