Spotlight: Year End Awards (2017) [VOTE]

Hi folks, the fine folks at the administration level of Lyrical Assault have allowed me to present to you a chance to be heard. Unlike with real life rules and regulations, your voice counts. I will be tossing up some mostly random things to vote on. No actual awards will be won, but its always nice to give a shout-out to your fellow lyrical assaultians (no typo). Why was I allowed this monumental task? No idea.. but you dont look a gift horse in the mouth. anyway.. here goes.


Hypest Moment of the Year:

for this one, we want to know what popped off that had you juiced. what was the one thing that absolutely stood out.


Best Battle (audio/text)

typically these things are put separate, but fuck that. what two cats had the best battle that hit the archives.

Funniest Member

this one kinda goes without saying. who makes you lulz on purpose.


Biggest Fuckboy

this one also goes without saying. who makes you lulz unintentionally.


Fav Verse from IC2

easy, right?.. I know we tried this before, lol.


Fav Verse from Bloodlines IV

we havnt tried this one… battle would be easier, but fuck it.. can only be one winner.

Saltiest Vote

shout-out to LP for this suggestion. who had the most venom in their blood when they cast a vote. I know of a few truly suspect votes… so dont get bashful. you can worry about sparing feelings next year.


Best… Worst Bar

theres been some LOL bars dropped this year. what was the one that made you think homie or homegirl should put the pen down.


Father of the Year award

who pulled off their belt and beat the fucking brakes off somebody this year.


Hoe of the Year

whos skirt needed to be pulled down just a tad. who wanted to dodge that bullet like Neo in the Matrix.

Who Ruined LA award

who is responsible for this downslide? can be a person or multiple. weather. vagina. penis. you tell us.

Most Improved

every year..no matter how slow. someone comes into their own. who you got?


Collab of the Year

who put it down in the most raw way.


Bananarama Mamajama award

in honor of my bestie Law, who deserves a banana in the tailpipe. who is too uptight and needs to loosen up a bit?


Sammy award

who wins the award for being the most motivational, inspiring and downright jovial chap. who will promise you hopes and dreams of a beach body and jot a 16 on the back of a napkin at burger king. who the coolest cat.

Hypest Moment of the Year: ima have to say Identity Crisis. IT was a huge success and we got to see many old school cats rise up from the dead.... only to see them dissappear shortly after. not to mention the fact that i of course got matched up agaisnt nigma for round 1... what a great way tostart topical battling. Assholes!

Best Battle: This one is going to have to go to an Audio battle. and to no surprise I will be nominating Lord Puente vs. D.Von Doom.this was one of the biggest battles of there year and really opened up the way to a new Audio Belt Title holder.

Funniest Member:in the past i would have easily said Ridley/Goryo/Tittysucker or whatever name he logs in as now a days..... but since he never is here, ima have to easily give this one to Neek. not only due to his phenominal trolling abilities, but for the fact that the guy brings comedy to nearly all his tracks that he drops.... and he has been saying a lot lately.

Biggest Fuckboy: DTK. i got to definitly give this man props on his transition to audio, but none the less it has been rough. im not saying he terrible.... but im not saying he isnt. no but really its just that i think he ended up with more beef than i did in 2017, and frankly that is impressive. there was a point i was beefing with half the site and had a diss dropped for me daily. shit was rough. I survived.... will he? just kidding, of course not, i slayed him long ago.

Fav Verse from IC2: fuck you, i dont recall and im not reading them all.

Fav Verse from Bloodlines: im one of those people who fall into the category "main reasons events fail" and i did not read many verses or place many votes. well fuck me.

Saltiest Vote - this one i was between two. there was a nonsense vote from Slip against Rutter Knows Best which cost rutter the battle. BUT, hands down by no comparison, i will have to say the saltiest vote was DTK against me in my battle against Ch3ck. Reason i put this on next level salty is because this was a massive battle for me and that salty vote was the reason i lost that battle.

Best... Worst Bar: There was recently a dragon wrapped in chrome who might as well have been wearing alligator boots, but there was also the Attraction Scars which is something that would never be forgotten. so Attraction Scars wins!

Father of the Year Award: this one is tricky. we have nigma's dad who beats the stupidity out of him at any moment.... but then we have endeeze, the soft, gentle giant.... who has his ass handed to him by his shark herding son... Who says they can only be goat farmers!

Hoe of the Year: Theres exo... then there is trizz.... but then there is exo. exo ducked quite a few people hard and did a dissapearing act right before our eyes. what an experiecne. Exo wins this one.

Who ruined LA Award: Bakardi when he left. i mean... wtf... come back.

Most Improved: Ima give this one to myself. 2017 was the year i really grew as an audio head. started at the bottom and rose to the top. its been a great endeavor.

Collab of the Year: i was between two collabs. There was the Shortcoming of Society with Neek, Kairo and I... which was fire and a great all around track. but then there was also that Elision collab that was just straight bars with all their heavy hitters in it. Ima have to give them the vote. I only dream of a part 2

Bananarama Mamajama Award: goes to the Banana himself. He abandoned us and left the site to die without ever looking back. except to let me know that i dropped the best shit he has ever heard.

Sammy Award: ima have to give this one to Neek. I mean he basically trying to give out Participation trophies. i mean... how fucking long is this list of bullshit awards?!?!




Well that was a trick, that was actually the last question, i thought his next post was a continuation of this 100 award giveaway!

Well done Neek. Ill be excited to see other opinions on this!




Edited by Lord Puente - 17 December 2017 at 1:37am

The lack of endeeze on these lists is astonishing. The man who bodied both Sammy and Self in one league! THE MYTH.

Endeavor wrote: The lack of endeeze on these lists is astonishing. The man who bodied both Sammy and Self in one league! THE MYTH.

I got you man

You're welcome

Hypest Moment of the Year: 

hands down...IC2

Best Battle (audio/text) 

it holds a personal attachment to me because it was like our first community audio collab but the "burn cypher" was my fav. 

Funniest Member 

Spume (i believe). and his funniest moment was that piece he wrote for the IC2 magazine. the number thing ha.

Biggest Fuckboy 

Sammy. neek's gave you an ample amount of time to record, you hoe ass muhfucka!

Fav Verse from IC2 

that turtle piece by endeezy lol. i don't know why that pop up in my head when i think of ic2

Fav Verse from Bloodlines IV 

not sure. i don't think i was payin attention to it.

Sammy wrote: Endeavor wrote: Finally someone who appreciates greatness. Thanks Ridley, you're a true friend. endy, don't make me shave your head

Hypest Moment of the Year: 
Had to be IC2. I think the fact that we had so much participation and the hype was there. The voting was there (initially). Every verse (that I read) was flame. Everyone was on their A game.

Best Battle (audio/text):
I don't usually vote on battles due to sheer laziness. The audio battle with Doom and LP.

Funniest Member:
Hmm...  Dizzles feedback with gifs gets me every now and again

Biggest Fuckboy:
Maybe not one individual but the whole Cuba, Nigma, Exo, Beans situation. 

Fav Verse from IC2:
Ehh.. can't think of one rn, I'll come back to this 

Fav Verse from Bloodlines IV:
Never heard of her

Saltiest Vote:
See above response

Best… Worst Bar:


Father of the Year award 
Chekk's bodybags 


Hoe of the Year 
Cuba... nuff said

Who Ruined LA award:
I think after round 2 of IC2 began the snowball effect. You saw the voting die down once people were eliminated and then when Bloodlines shit the bed and all of that really just got whack tbh. I think it's a mixture of a poorly ran event after a quite successful one and the members becoming disinterested 

Most Improved 
Dizzle... just look at his work

Collab of the Year 
Twisted Oz joint... (thanks for the shout Sammy)

Bananarama Mamajama award 
Scoot... just because lol 

Sammy award 
Self.. when he drops a verse it makes me want to write competitively to be on his level.