Open Mic: My Story Bottled

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   I had a bad upbringing, seeming malicious
My Dad buried a lot of pain and he couldn't lift it
He had no fitness to prevent turning bleak and sadistic
And he'd relent in anger towards my Mum, beating her senseless
I would watch or listen as they'd scream in the kitchen
Living-room and even bedroom, I couldn't sleep 'n' it twisted
My mind, no stable home life would be unrealistic
To raise me to normal grounds where I can heed for a living
Mum became an alcoholic and put me in positions
Where I had no one to turn to 'bout keeping an interest
Gaining motivation to not be a freak in the system
Since the only person I could relate to was deadbeat 'n' conflicted
My Dad tried to change, he became sane and tried seeing his wishes
Of being a better father but I couldn't see to forgive him
And in school I was bullied and had no freedom remitted
To get by and no parent to keep me believing a different
Way of life would unfold, I knew I'd be inconsistent
And not have it about me to chase my dreams in an instant
And forever dwell on lost opportunit-ies reminiscing
On past wishes that never developed, seeking admittance
'Coz I wasn't given a life as a kid I sincerely admit it
I'd never grasp how things work and how to feed with the fishes
Can't even swim yet I'm in the most extreme of positions
Failing to fend and commit, I'm in the deepest of shit 'nd
Can't stay out of trouble as I rebel 'gainst the themes of the systems
That keep us in place since I've grown fed up as I reach for a hit 'n'
Addicted to the numbing sensation drugs got me feeling a fix 'n'
It's pretty much the only reason for me to keep living
And now my family care as I freeze in the mix of
Chaos and nothingness, they bring heat to the kitchen
Trynna stir up a change now and I can't be-gin to jus' let it
Happen so I go cold on 'em for the demons to witness
The shouting from my parents got me weak in consistence
Curled up and shrouded in glass, keeping my distance
I'm needing assistance but my defeated ambitions
Of a life got me giving up trynna cease my existence
Stuck in the bottle, the bleeding so vicious
As emotions contained turn to scars deep in this prism
A prisoner in my own mind with no peace or resistence
Drowning in my sorrows so I can't breathe with persistence
And that's when this all flashes back and I put this brief in a written
As all the grief burns away as I hand myself to the Reaper's collection.  

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The Rap Daemon Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Standard Member Joined: 05 August 2015 Location: Purgatory Status: Offline Points: 1108 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-14-0 Form: LWLWWL	Post Options Post Reply Quote The Rap Daemon Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Topic: My Story Bottled Posted: 14 March 2018 at 2:06am
	I had a bad upbringing, seeming malicious My Dad buried a lot of pain and he couldn't lift it He had no fitness to prevent turning bleak and sadistic And he'd relent in anger towards my Mum, beating her senseless I would watch or listen as they'd scream in the kitchen Living-room and even bedroom, I couldn't sleep 'n' it twisted My mind, no stable home life would be unrealistic To raise me to normal grounds where I can heed for a living Mum became an alcoholic and put me in positions Where I had no one to turn to 'bout keeping an interest Gaining motivation to not be a freak in the system Since the only person I could relate to was deadbeat 'n' conflicted My Dad tried to change, he became sane and tried seeing his wishes Of being a better father but I couldn't see to forgive him And in school I was bullied and had no freedom remitted To get by and no parent to keep me believing a different Way of life would unfold, I knew I'd be inconsistent And not have it about me to chase my dreams in an instant And forever dwell on lost opportunit-ies reminiscing On past wishes that never developed, seeking admittance 'Coz I wasn't given a life as a kid I sincerely admit it I'd never grasp how things work and how to feed with the fishes Can't even swim yet I'm in the most extreme of positions Failing to fend and commit, I'm in the deepest of shit 'nd Can't stay out of trouble as I rebel 'gainst the themes of the systems That keep us in place since I've grown fed up as I reach for a hit 'n' Addicted to the numbing sensation drugs got me feeling a fix 'n' It's pretty much the only reason for me to keep living And now my family care as I freeze in the mix of Chaos and nothingness, they bring heat to the kitchen Trynna stir up a change now and I can't be-gin to jus' let it Happen so I go cold on 'em for the demons to witness The shouting from my parents got me weak in consistence Curled up and shrouded in glass, keeping my distance I'm needing assistance but my defeated ambitions Of a life got me giving up trynna cease my existence Stuck in the bottle, the bleeding so vicious As emotions contained turn to scars deep in this prism A prisoner in my own mind with no peace or resistence Drowning in my sorrows so I can't breathe with persistence And that's when this all flashes back and I put this brief in a written As all the grief burns away as I hand myself to the Reaper's collection.
	Faggot

Crimson Juice Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Site Moderator Joined: 20 December 2015 Location: U.K. Status: Offline Points: 3258 Crew: Lyricist Inc. Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-11-0 Form: LLWLW	Post Options Post Reply Quote Crimson Juice Report Post Likes(1) Quote Reply Posted: 14 March 2018 at 7:23pm
	I liked this "kicking your way through shit" verse hear,the badly dealt hand in life that lots of ppl experience,the assonance within this piece was good too,plus the fact it didn't sway of course and stayed linear was also a bonus,as these sort of verses have a tendency to veer off path and become spatial,so props there,(and its good to read you taking part in the WD too,as this can also helps the creative juices flow),the only gripe I have here,(and this is just me being picky) was the subjects matter on the whole,it didn't feel or read original,drops/poems of this nature have been done countless of times,you did however manage to put your own slant on this worn/tired topic though,i also believe a few inner rhymes would of lifted this piece up even further from the readers prospective via that course,still this was well worth the time to read for anyone who's browsing,good work..peace.
	"You need to learn how to make an exit, before you can dare make an entrance".