Open Mic: Old School 16er

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The Rap Daemon View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote The Rap Daemon Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: Old School 16er
    Posted: 19 April 2017 at 7:08am
I'm old school, so rude back when no rule
Could hold through, disrespectful to those few
Who opposed using known tools of pussy-footing
Rookie's pushing things they won't pull, like a rogue goose
In a field of eagles, you know I'm so focused with the
Pen I can write holy scriptures, not quite Bibles but omens inked up
To potent motives, control the image on a global picture
Notice I'm as a close a mixture of Jaz-Cat and Adolfus Hitler
You new-schoolers are too used ta 'tech' to really reap a living
Or keep a killing, we're both speakers but you're no achiever, listen
To get loud, you have to speak emission, to keep a pitch in
I'm like a keeper pitching, I always catch on and speak a mission
Then have it all in my hands, this sixteen is the picking
To either get y'all on the wagon or ride out the weak n the missing
Within this, this won't be complete 'til it's finished though freely it's written
This procedure is needed 'coz the features are twisted
'Coz this game's become a shell of what it used to be like Easter tradition
The treat is a 'kidding', just call me Dr. School 'coz I'm seizing the given
With beastly admission teaching the sickness it's place and keeping it kicking
Steeping the ticking unforgiving but given the bleakened condition
I've become the streak of ambition in the dying light, well seen I am ripping
'Coz I've gone 'over sixteen' like this is now school for all the wisher peeps who're tripping.

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Sammy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Sammy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 April 2017 at 1:01pm
This should be gettin more feed and sorry it took me so long to do so lol. I did read this when U first posted it up but there were so much goin on at the time (IC2, audio) lol bit yeah this was illmatic.

So I see this was another shot at jaz-cat lol. U should probably dead that tho. I don't even think dude's around anymore. This was a bit better than the last offering. Wordings were more crisps and lines were more clever and I don't have to say much about the flow, ur pretty much flawless in that dept. overall, not bad my dude. No write a story using the same technica merit.

I don't know where I'm going from here, but I promise it won't be boring. -David Bowie (RIP)
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iLL ScriptureZ View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote iLL ScriptureZ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 April 2017 at 1:40pm
I agree with Sammys feed back as in some of your wordings was more refined. Especially in the multisyllable arena. It was nice to see my elevation there. Your flow, believe it or not, was pretty decent. I say that with some surprise as I didn't expect much. I think you really just have to think. It seems, to me, that you get writing a bar and kind of drift off from the direction you originally intended. Execution man.
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Schematic View Drop Down

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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Schematic Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 April 2017 at 11:42pm
Some parts sounded force but nice verrse over all very good multies and flow was consistent throughout the whole piece.
Destiny is the Present
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