Print Page | Close Window

[WD#6] - Spurious 8

Printed From: Lyrical Assault
Category: Emcee Lounge
Forum Name: Open Mic
Forum Description: This isnt a Battle Board, this is for your Freestyle Verses to be Rated by other members.
URL: http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=43855
Printed Date: 28 March 2024 at 10:05am


Topic: [WD#6] - Spurious 8
Posted By: Ridley Squat
Subject: [WD#6] - Spurious 8
Date Posted: 10 October 2016 at 10:28pm
WD6 was brought to you by the words: nascent, colostrum, ruminate, preclude, pantomime, proclivity, fabricate, ephemeral, farrago and spurious



Satan-born I take my form ... assuming I'm an antichrist
Pre-NASCENT faun with razor horns and humans as a sacrifice
Udder-fed COLOSTRUM as I RUMINATE a thousand crimes ... but
Rid ain't here for clowning so PRECLUDE me from your PANTOMIME
In my PROCLIVITY to FABRICATE illusions using slanted rhymes ...
One life is too EPHEMERAL, like losing grains in sands of time ... so
Unto this world's FARRAGO I go, tooled up like it's hammer time ... and
Sign off with a cross/tick, like a clue for where to countersign

-------------



Replies:
Posted By: alicewonder
Date Posted: 10 October 2016 at 11:22pm
I thought this was pretty good, especially considering the line limit and word usage.
The rhythmic pattern was the highlight to me, consistent while having an interesting, varying tone to it due to the smoothly executed switch ups. The only line which seemed rather decent to me was the "ruminate a thousand crimes" one, compared to the other great ones. I loved the "illusions using slanted rhymes" bar, very authentic and yet humorous. I generally enjoy the entertaining tone of the few verses I've seen from you so far, and this was no different. 


Posted By: Droidian
Date Posted: 11 October 2016 at 12:12am
cool. .this buys this drop 5 more days

-------------
http://postimage.org/" rel="nofollow">



Posted By: Ridley Squat
Date Posted: 13 October 2016 at 12:52am
Thanks Alice, greatly appreciated.

But has anyone caught the missing word ... clue is in the last line ...

-------------


Posted By: alicewonder
Date Posted: 14 October 2016 at 11:00pm
I guess you're referring to the 'spurious' bit with the cross-tick line? At least that's how I got it with regard to the missing word (if we exclude the title, that is). Guess your approach might be more complex, though. 


Posted By: Ridley Squat
Date Posted: 15 October 2016 at 11:52am
Originally posted by Ridley Squat Ridley Squat wrote:

Satan-born I take my form ... assuming I'm an antichrist
Pre-NASCENT faun with razor horns and humans as a sacrifice
Udder-fed COLOSTRUM as I RUMINATE a thousand crimes ... but
Rid ain't here for clowning so PRECLUDE me from your PANTOMIME
In my PROCLIVITY to FABRICATE illusions using slanted rhymes ...
One life is too EPHEMERAL, like losing grains in sands of time ... so
Unto this world's FARRAGO I go, tooled up like it's hammer time ... and
Sign off with a cross/tick, like a clue for where to countersign

Yeah that's it, 'a cross/tick' = acrostic
an additional self-imposed challenge, lol
I just didn't want folks to think I was being lazy by just putting one of the words in the title



-------------



Print Page | Close Window