[WD#7] Hippie Chick
Printed From: Lyrical Assault
Category: Emcee Lounge
Forum Name: Open Mic
Forum Description: This isnt a Battle Board, this is for your Freestyle Verses to be Rated by other members.
URL: http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=44298
Printed Date: 19 April 2024 at 1:03am
Topic: [WD#7] Hippie Chick
Posted By: Ridley Squat
Subject: [WD#7] Hippie Chick
Date Posted: 23 December 2016 at 9:13pm
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Word Drop 7 was brought to you by the words: Relic, Depravity, Detonate, Mirage, Pulchritude, Whale, Placard, Onomatopoeia, Tourniquet and Sanguine  They say that our methods are a relic from the damn past And that such depravity ain't welcome in their backyards 'bout to detonate the tear gas when I notice at the vanguard a mirage of such pulchritude ... I totally gotta bang hard! 'SAVE THE FUCKING WHALES' was the slogan on her placard So I sidled through, once I'd removed my labcoat and my lanyard She got that Boom! ... she was hotter than a thousand degrees And on-a-matter-peer related, she was outa my league Her name was Tawny Kay so I knew she'd wind up tight with me And my heart just sang-when she said she'd spend some time with me But reduced me to blubber when she left & said goodbye to me ...... will she ever get the irony? -------------   |
Replies:
Posted By: alicewonder
Date Posted: 25 December 2016 at 12:08am
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This was a quite entertaining read, which is always one of the highlights of your work. I really enjoyed your rather creative approach on the given words, 'on-a-matter-peer' and 'Tawny Kay' being a the stand out examples here. I also though that the incorporation of the picture give this approach a very original tone, without being 'overly done'. I appreciate the rather straightforward, 'simple story' coupled with the very unconventional narrative. A quite humorous approach overall. Nice work.
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Posted By: -Que-
Date Posted: 02 January 2017 at 5:11am
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Bro!! I was already entertained by the presentation alone lmaooo! "mirage of such pulchritude ... I totally gotta bang hard!" ^^That's that pimp shit bruh lol Aint gonna lie ...I had to google Lanyard. When I seen what is was I died laughin. Some shit my homie would say just to get fools thinkin lol. Anyhow this was very humorous and fun. interesting ways of using the WD words and just making it easy and entertaining. ------------- |
Posted By: Crimson Juice
Date Posted: 22 January 2017 at 10:02am
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Yeah i liked this,you did some nice flips on the key words here I thought,which came off as creative really,also liked how you used the word tourniquet and onomatopoeie too,all done in your trademark style,(rhyme blended with humour),although this had a simple vibe to it it did nothing but enhance this piece really,as it kept this clean and clutter free so to speak,which in turn also aided the overall flow,and the fact you went for a story based piece also was a highlight in itself,as to do a story in 10 lines is no easy feat,so props there,an enjoyable and well thoughtout drop on the whole,nice read..peace. ------------- "You need to learn how to make an exit, before you can dare make an entrance". |
Posted By: Crimson Juice
Date Posted: 22 January 2017 at 10:03am
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Yeah i liked this,you did some nice flips on the key words here I thought,which came off as creative really,also liked how you used the word tourniquet and onomatopoeie too,all done in your trademark style,(rhyme blended with humour),although this had a simple vibe to it it did nothing but enhance this piece really,as it kept this clean and clutter free so to speak,which in turn also aided the overall flow,and the fact you went for a story based piece also was a highlight in itself,as to do a story in 10 lines is no easy feat,so props there,an enjoyable and well thoughtout drop on the whole,nice read..peace. ------------- "You need to learn how to make an exit, before you can dare make an entrance". |