**Check my skills pt1**
Printed From: Lyrical Assault
Category: Emcee Lounge
Forum Name: Open Mic
Forum Description: This isnt a Battle Board, this is for your Freestyle Verses to be Rated by other members.
URL: http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=46549
Printed Date: 19 April 2024 at 3:54pm
Topic: **Check my skills pt1**
Posted By: Old Flame
Subject: **Check my skills pt1**
Date Posted: 24 July 2019 at 5:21pm
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I've got a bat, I'll twat your cat cuz youre fat, what ja think of that flappiddy flap, blah blah blah - Im back the best to ever rap, better that your dad Prepare for part 2 cuz it'll top the shit I just did What do ya think?  |
Replies:
Posted By: Old Flame
Date Posted: 24 July 2019 at 5:34pm
No feedback? Was it the "flappiddy flap" part? 
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Posted By: Absolute Abomination
Date Posted: 27 July 2019 at 12:18pm
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i know its satire but...fuck ------------- Show me a fortress and I'll show you a ruin. |
Posted By: Crimson Juice
Date Posted: 28 July 2019 at 7:48pm
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OK, i get its done in a tongue in cheek vibe, but as it stands it's awfully basic,it just doesn't have any appeal or stand out wording/lines going for it, and in truth it's kind of flat on reading also, and if your serious about doing a part 2, please if anything give it a pulse by injecting a little depth, either through similies or meta's or even assonance..peace. ------------- "You need to learn how to make an exit, before you can dare make an entrance". |
Posted By: D.Von Doom
Date Posted: 29 July 2019 at 1:18am
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Crimson ban this trash ------------- I can only fall off in space... |