Open Mic: The Goomba
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iLL ScriptureZ View Drop Down
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Form: LWWLWW 		Post Options Post Options   Likes (2) Likes(2)   Quote iLL ScriptureZ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: The Goomba
    Posted: 31 December 2018 at 5:04pm



A scent arose of drenched cologne 
The stench alone set the tone…
Each sentence holds… weight
Resembled old myths but better known
His, presence of power left us cold
As weather froze ponds, etched in stone
Names & dates with western quotes
Flowers fell… pedals float
Sink to depths & bloat, lesson notes
To let’em know, respect the oath
Don’t ever gloat, calm & tempered clothed
Trilby lid… trench the coat
Flare ends in smoke… embers stoked
Only the for the greedy do the records show
Enter those in secrecy, never spoke
Of the treasure glow, his ledger owns
Net to gross… specs & codes 
Debts to close & bets imposed 
…a list of who rests below
Threatened familia… severed throats
Click of a weapon load…
Any clever mole gets sent as ghosts
Which reads louder than any message wrote
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Sammy View Drop Down
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Form: LNW 		Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Sammy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 January 2019 at 5:05pm
damn slept on hawwwdddd! ur transition as a writer is not lost on me and this piece. you've always had the tight flow and mechanics but about late 2018, it was apparent you've incorporated poetic elements. I was like oh man, i'm glad ur trying new things but please dont' let him lose touch of his base strength and i'm happy to report that u did NOT lose sight of what makes your writing your own. This was crazy. the first 4 lines were perfect. flow, wording, concept...it was crazy The juxtaposing of very calming imagery via some dope poetics with the darker tone of the narrative was expertly done here. It inspired me to scribe something up and will be posting it soon. your feed would be much appreciated, sir. 


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Vellum View Drop Down
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Form: WWWWWW 		Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Vellum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 January 2019 at 10:23pm
GOD DAMN!!

These multis can rival Eminem during his infinite album days and that's a huge compliment!
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daydizzle89 View Drop Down
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Form: LWWLLW 		Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote daydizzle89 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 January 2019 at 2:07pm
jEEZ,

That scheme was nasty. Flow was as usual, content was really dope and the vocabulary was perfect for this. like

drenched cologne
stench alone
etched in stone
pedals float
depths & bloat
tempered clothed

That type of vocabulary and wording makes this piece stand out. When you mix your vocabulary and use key words in the multi itself. it makes the text much more better. you good at that.

dope piece
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SELF ACTIVATE View Drop Down
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Form: WL 		Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote SELF ACTIVATE Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 January 2019 at 7:02pm
This is some real Mafioso/La Costa Nostra type of shit. I dig it. The flow was butter. The multis were perfectly synchronized and the blood thirsty poetry was both chilling and elegant at the same time. Props.
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spume corrupt View Drop Down
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Form: WLWLLL 		Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote spume corrupt Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12 January 2019 at 12:16am
You got a special talent with the pen man
Dope multis no doubt, but how you impart so much in such a minimal way is just next level
I can’t front on that ability
Banging lil read

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