LA Magazine: The Word Drop Winner Mag (Dec 2017) |
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Crimson Juice
Site Moderator Joined: 20 December 2015 Location: U.K. Status: Offline Points: 3258 Crew: Lyricist Inc. Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-11-0 Form: LLWLW |
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Posted: 07 January 2018 at 11:44am |
Well 1st people let me start this (Word Drop) mag volume 1,with a big thanks for all
involved,not just the ppl who dropped a verse,but those who feed them pieces as well,it's a balance,and that balance was pleasing to see,and to be honest the World at large could do with some balance also,but hey that's another topic,anyways back with the mag,i was pleased also to read some entries from vets here in this challenge, i know motivation is hard for you guys as you've seen it and done it all,what more is left for you guys?,the answer would be your valuable input either through challenges like this and feedback,which is what i see here at LA,so a Salute goes out your way from me,now with the current number of entries standing at 7 i must say each one of these submissions are solid,(gave me flash backs to IC2 via the quality),so props guys,there is something else i want to address here also,a member wrote an OM saying that the WD was stifling creativity,and in theory has no place here at LA,well we're all entitled to an opinion and he expressed he's with a OM/shot at this challen- ge,i kindly replied to his OM via feedback explaining my thoughts and letting him know the needs of many here out weight the needs of the few,and whilst i'm on this subject,a shout out to RKB who summed it up with a cool gif,(thanks for the support bro),now back to the reveal,this was not as easy as i thought in deciding a winner, each contestant brought some solid concepts/angles which gave me a headache when choosing a Victor it was that hard. Stalin. What Challenge??. Tryin to redeem a fraction of my holiness Boredom led to temptation of a specific foliage It shackles my essence stuck in the traffic to heaven The climate raises from the trauma blast from this lesson mmm nice,i just want to say this was 'icy' how you pulled it off in just 4 lines,plus it had a cool deep concept i thought,it seemed like a corrupted soul awaiting to be processed and judge for the afterlife,which for me ties the word foliage (guise) in well,in fact it deserves props as word placing/concept goes,i also liked how you used these keywords and heightened them to express more than their (stand alone) use,this piece had the stamp of a seasoned writer all through it,short but Sweet and nicely done.. Slip. Crimson Thoughts. In the essence of a trauma just a fraction of the pain From the boredem that he suffers causes traffic in the brain Thoughts racing through his head as foliage fall from trees He sees the climate start to drop when things began to freeze A chance to break these shackles of temptation he believes If he redeems himself tonight thats all he really needs Some good clean writing here Slip,in less than 10 lines too,well six in fact,and the flow was also good,shit i even liked the contents,kind of came off like i'm slow to grasp things in essence,a cheeky drop that had humour within via tongue and cheek, always good to read humour within a piece that element alone adds a layer to a drop,the other plus was it flowed well also,you made good use of the key words too for the most part,the foliage line didn't quite work though,comparing a racing or fleeting thought to a leaf in autumn/fall was for me on the opposite end of the spectrum in comparison,nice drop buddy.. Neek. Crimson Fruit. rappers like the Triad, baddest by a mile these faggots arent a fraction of the climate when the boredom set, the chess board begins rigor mortis, is my foliage - my source of bliss controlled within, I redeem what im 'posed to win its the essence, of why they don't contend ive unraveled trauma, while it shackles them they worship til the end like Mary Magdalene no temptation would cause a change in them. like traffic - its frustratin' they cant erase the mess. I'm firstly going to draw attention to your contents here,they came off as very forward/direct,they also had a kind of broody and inward looking asset/quality to them,it came off as a you v them scenario too,all whilst having a controlled calm, (via foliage use),i also thought you blended the key words in well overall, shit i even liked the way you weaved in some subtle humour within this piece, your scheme as to the vibe were compelling as well,plus i'll also give you credit for the swiftness in which you churned this piece out,impressive.. RKB. And So. Ya'll ain't got a fraction of my skills, I guess I thought I'd mention When all is settled you fall like petals that's where the trauma stems from Gave up drink...Jack, Jim n all my friends gone..been sober a few weeks Now I'm all about these foliage bars...I'm turning over a new leaf Once I take the shackles off n let truth speak there's no way back Ya must be massive fans of traffic jams..cos ya going no where fast Try Show some class, redeem yourselves and write some plays you cunts Nowadays i swear that temptation don't exist like climate change to Trump And I just like saying Cunt. its essence n the feelings feeling off the tongue Now boredom ensues cos i'm boarding with fools..I used to do this shit for fun! Rut's i liked this verse here,i liked the fact you layered in punch laden bars also, again another piece containing humour which was working nicely too,you also made the key words fit well within this verse which grabs at a reader and keeps them there till the end,you also had a set of very cool comparison words,petal/ stem,and Jack Jim/sober,just to highlight a couple this had to offer so props there,i also liked the plays you scribed in as well as they also had wit attached, foliage/leaf,traffic jams/nowhere fast,yeah a solid submission from you.. Absolute Abomination. Absolute. An angel trying to redeem my energy My essence, no fraction, I mean all of me Resist the temptress tempting me, temptation free of shackles Next challege I tackle; ascend LA Mountain, the harshest climate I climb it effortlessly, mad so witness me Max pain, trauma delivery to wack emcees Read between the lines to see my referencing AB assaults LA traffic outta boredom from they OM drops; Dead foliage leaves bodies, the maverick hoard 'em 'til he head honch OH! 10 in 9 stopwatch lure more in, they necks Sasquatch squash tomorrow morning Well AB's i thought this piece was quite poetic,it also had an abstract/sublime kind off vibe etched in too,which for me brought an added layer on the whole,all the while masking the selfhype contents your subtly displaying here,which also gave it a sort of puzzle feel to it on reading,that i found quite creative overall,i got a kick from this piece because of these facts,i do like a pieces that force the grey matter to come into play and be used,and in truth i thought this was refreshing via its approach.. Cuba. Crimson Tide. Throw off the shackles of my boredom with words that are graphic And since my sentences are dope it's the verbs that I traffic Temptation that I package, cut it down into fractions When I drop a quart even Christ couldn't redeem for my actions Call these plants for what they are, nothing but foliage In this climate they all bitches even though they Joli's age You'd have to mastectomy these tits to feel the essence of my trauma Now watch me burn this eighth to close the loop without the corners Now this was very cohesive,each line ran into the next effortlessly,i really liked the way you constructed this verse,plus the use of the key words within too,this is a piece that was brimming with comparisons also,it was real clever angle to come with i thought so kudos there,your w/plays were very subtle but effective overall, (sentences/dope verbs/traffic fraction/quarter) just to hash out a couple of what i'm talking about,and the contents/vocabulary was all layered like a big chocolate gateau that was covered with poetic icing, delicious.. Dntplywelwithothers. Crimson Wave. Either temptation or boredom, Inspired this venture The traffic is NUTS....What kinda race did I enter? The climate has risen...A fraction, or higher.... I must tackle these shackles...the conquest is dire! To redeem my own essence...Foliage. Growth... On my own family tree...wait.... is that the throat!?!? Arduous was the journey, but soon trauma follows. Where the fuck is the EGG! OH SHIT!!! Mama swallowed... I must state i liked your approach/angle here with the given words,i feel humour was the strongest asset within this piece,(nothing wrong with fun/laughter,and light hearted fun),making ppl smile or smirk works well for me,I feel in parts the key words were used real well,and in other not so much,but looking at this as a whole it didn't dampen/taint this to much really,the words i feel that fell by the wayside were trauma and foliage,they didn't seem to connect and came off as out off place and unrelated,still I did get a kick from this piece.. Before we get to naming the Word Drop king this month,i would just like to add that i personally found these drops to be solid,and each had great concepts,and humour was very much the theme for the most part,again i liked to stress this wasn't easy to pick a winner,as all came with a unique twist to the key words provided,so drum roll please and ready the falling glitter confetti and balloons.. 1st place..Cuba. 2nd place..Stalin. 3rd place..RKB. (Crimson Tide)..The Reason Why It Won. It was the usage of the key words to form a kind of selfhype piece,it was also the most technical with the mechanics in writing OM's,plus it was so fluent he's lines were like liquid with a ripple acting as flow..Well Done. Now before i sign off,again thanks to all the participants and the LA community at large,you guys made this an enjoyable venture for me,and I look forward to the next Word Drop challenge with some zest and anticipation,Thanks All...peace. Cuba - Crimson Tied http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/crimson-tied-twd-1_topic45594.html Dntplywelwitothers - Crimson Waves http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/wd-crimson-waves-wd_topic45600.html Stalin - What Challenge?? http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/twd1-challengewhat-challenge_topic45559.html Neek - Crimson Fruit http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/wd-crimson-fruit-wd_topic45553.html Slip - Crimson Thoughts http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/twdc1wdcrimson-thoughtswd_topic45555.html Rutter knows best - And so.. http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/wd1and-sowd_topic45557.html Absolute Abomination - Absolute http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/twd1-challenge-absolute_topic45563.html ps..if you missed December's challenge have no fear,because a new challenge will be issued on the 12th of this month (January 2018). |
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"You need to learn how to make an exit,
before you can dare make an entrance". |
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Neek
Site Moderator Super Mario Slaughterer Joined: 05 October 2004 Status: Offline Points: 3862 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 3-1-0 Form: LWWW |
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good call Crim, I also felt Cubes took this one. had some really dope submissions tho. nice write up as well. youre a rockstar my friend.
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#Bananas
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Absolute Abomination
Standard Member Joined: 15 May 2015 Location: Australia Status: Offline Points: 556 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 3-3-0 Form: LLWW |
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Good reads. Thanks for the effort Crim.
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Show me a fortress and I'll show you a ruin.
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Cuba
Senior Moderator Legendary Assassin Joined: 14 June 2004 Location: England Status: Offline Points: 12327 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 47-22-0 Form: WWWWLW |
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Still got it...
Just entered to bulk the numbers Crimbo, nice work on bringing this back and making it your own |
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Crimson Juice
Site Moderator Joined: 20 December 2015 Location: U.K. Status: Offline Points: 3258 Crew: Lyricist Inc. Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-11-0 Form: LLWLW |
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Thanks guys,you know i enjoyed doing this challenge/mag..peace.
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"You need to learn how to make an exit,
before you can dare make an entrance". |
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daydizzle89
Superior Member Joined: 23 July 2014 Status: Offline Points: 3805 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-11-0 Form: LWWLLW |
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Very exceptional with the MAG VOL HERE
Keep up the dope work Crim, you are a shining example of progress. |
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Lord Puente
Newbie Final Boss Joined: 05 July 2016 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 1814 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 4-2-0 Form: LWWWLW |
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Cuba so modest. He like, “I beat y’all with a pitty entry”... Savage.
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Crimson Juice
Site Moderator Joined: 20 December 2015 Location: U.K. Status: Offline Points: 3258 Crew: Lyricist Inc. Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-11-0 Form: LLWLW |
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Thanks Dizzle you're a real star for sure.
lol..Puente,yeah i agree he was in beast mode with that post (Cuba),vanity eh...peace. |
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"You need to learn how to make an exit,
before you can dare make an entrance". |
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Rutter knows best
Senior Moderator Joined: 15 March 2014 Location: Manny hood Status: Offline Points: 4529 Crew: EMPIRE Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 44-12-0 Form: WWWWLW |
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Good work crim. nice write up.
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#bananas
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