Crew Feedback Thread
Printed From: Lyrical Assault
Category: Archive Forums
Forum Name: Site Archive
Forum Description: Achive for old messages here.
URL: http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=33289
Printed Date: 27 March 2026 at 5:44am
Topic: Crew Feedback Thread
Posted By: barrybondz
Subject: Crew Feedback Thread
Date Posted: 14 July 2014 at 9:28am
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I dropped this in the audio section let me know what ya'll think. [soundcloud]http://soundcloud.com/bam-m-1/cynical[/soundcloud]
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Replies:
Posted By: MayDayMozart
Date Posted: 14 July 2014 at 2:20pm
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we need a new sig for the crew... I mean , new sigs for all ! DjFlame, I've made a new sig for u, one with vault boy in it, but since I've got a 'troll alert', i can't post pics, (even my own sig is not visible)... As soon as the alert is dropped, I'll post ur sig... Ps, collab ??? Can we start sharing ideas ?
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Posted By: barrybondz
Date Posted: 14 July 2014 at 6:22pm
| what do you mean raw? Like real emotion? It's kinda just a story like em's legacy lol. |
Posted By: barrybondz
Date Posted: 14 July 2014 at 6:25pm
| No, not at all. That's basically just a straight recording with zero editing. |
Posted By: barrybondz
Date Posted: 14 July 2014 at 9:14pm
| I don't know know how good the punches are but I imagine point is a real machine/magician to battle against. Crazy xp this guy and I imagine the judges are gonna vote based off of lyrical punches and that may be your downfall despite the good ideas. Like good ideas but the end punches don't rhyme and I'm pretty sure I've seen people turn a nazi eye to that kind of stuff. |
Posted By: barrybondz
Date Posted: 14 July 2014 at 9:16pm
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check it this is for my battle vs T. 60 second runtime (audio) I think this is much much better than my battle vs you dj. Now now now, if this guys t im like the btk Bind, torture and kill your ass on mic going Ohhh k No sweat t, do you understand personification? The way you spit you lack pronunciation You rap like a robot spitting through a donut Fucking wing nut your screws loose you ain't grownup Like a little bipolar kid who's jekyll and hyde It's do or die t and you always rap tongue tied This battles easily won I just have to speak clearer You're a wannabe rapper who's not an adapter look in the mirror They says ones reflections tells us who we are What do you see t? You think you're some superstar? Your heads so far up your own ass you believe your own shit Your dreams dead, you'll never rap lickety split I pity the fool t who don't read it, cuz you'll never rap gold You ain't witty, if this was blackjack you'd just fold You had the nerve to say ss wasn't a vet ? (haha) He's fucked you in every battle like your pussy was wet |
Posted By: Pompus
Date Posted: 14 July 2014 at 9:21pm
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first 2 bars, hilarious 3rd drop to a jab, saw what you did there with commenting on him not being a vet cause he's a mod and that not being the only reason, funny but i had to think about it an extra second, don't know if that will take 4th more a personal, not really hitting other than the name calling (twat) all in all, let me just say, with those first 2 bars, i'm glad you were on that mode when we battled hell, I might have voted for you lol good shit |
Posted By: barrybondz
Date Posted: 14 July 2014 at 9:26pm
| I actually think it's pretty clever now reading. It's kind of outside of the normal box and that's kinda what you need vs someone like him. |
Posted By: nigerchu
Date Posted: 14 July 2014 at 9:29pm
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Right now I'm writin shit bu I'll post feed brothas -------------  |
Posted By: barrybondz
Date Posted: 14 July 2014 at 9:34pm
| haha this whole battle is me bashing him on his pronunciation because he's so hard to understand. This is an audio battle so I imagine this will murder him and the last punch is like icing on the cake because he said ss wasn't a vet to me. There's quite a few punches in here really if you get the humor. |
Posted By: Pompus
Date Posted: 14 July 2014 at 9:37pm
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hmm better, more direct, what about "i read his profile, you were begging for help point blank, on a topical drop" too loose a name play? |
Posted By: Pompus
Date Posted: 14 July 2014 at 9:48pm
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lol my bad, well the way you reworded it was a little harder, but i think a little more beef in the middle of the line would help, name play or playing off of the topical thing or somethin. i wish i had your name, i keep thinking up little lines if i had it and was dissing, nothin hardcore just fun, well to me anyway "i storm through like tornadoes and burn labels i'm DJ flame, you're a faggot with turntables" haha stuff like that |
Posted By: nigerchu
Date Posted: 14 July 2014 at 9:59pm
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Yo Flame wanna post here our collab b4 posting it on open mic? if so, just lemme finish it ------------- |
Posted By: barrybondz
Date Posted: 15 July 2014 at 3:06am
| [soundcloud]https://soundcloud.com/bam-m-1/barryvsrappert[/soundcloud] |
Posted By: MayDayMozart
Date Posted: 15 July 2014 at 3:16am
| Make a new thread like 'Random Talk' or 'Crew Chat' , for all other things... I guess this, the crew feedback one woulb be getting cluttered soon enough...! :p just a thought... |
Posted By: nigerchu
Date Posted: 18 July 2014 at 9:19pm
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^^ First, great verse. Opener was funny and the prolly the best bar was : The Bleakest shit! And now you should listen as I proudly speak Go a round with me? The only time they "Catch Z's" is when you put the crowd to sleep (cracked me up) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Also, can I get some feed in this. These are lyrics for my first AM. It flows well in the beat, just give me some criticism: (PT=Portugal) I'm spittin this shit while I'm flowin with it like no fucking brit you've seen, You have to witness and say it's true I split your spirit in two with just one hit down to you, you'll have no fucking clue who I know it says UK but now PT is in charge, You watch others get beaten you think that musta been harsh Don't underestimate me cuz I'm only thirteen, I stab you till I see a red river you get depressed like a lonely queen Now, I'll tell you a secret and you better keep it You better salve it, If you don't I'll make you weep it The secret is I make it no matter who my opponent is, chicken Dark past, 1, 3 lasted, parents blasted a black hole in this kid He casted to hell but there's a good part he needs to get rid Of, You kill this motherfucker and he's finally dead... BUT THE BITCH GETS BACK He's no fake like Packed He's like a phoenix and you're gonna get smacked He is a king, Fact Cuz he made a pact With Satan he's good but with no soul in reelect You're just a target You die I'm intact So weak you get retarded with a ch3kk impact Don't say I'm abstract Or I'm distracted Cuz this shit as real as the apple and Isaac ------------- |
Posted By: nigerchu
Date Posted: 20 July 2014 at 7:36pm
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Yeah, man, I didn't pay much attention to the lyrics. But I recognize it was bad, and the vocals too. But me and barry will post an Audio Mic soon and I'll improve. Thanks for the feed. ------------- |
Posted By: barrybondz
Date Posted: 20 July 2014 at 11:41pm
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[soundcloud]https://soundcloud.com/bam-m-1/eliteremake[/soundcloud]
Out of boredom lol -------------  |
Posted By: nigerchu
Date Posted: 21 July 2014 at 9:41pm
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Can anyone give me some feed on this, me and barry will turn it into audio, this is my verse, he will write his: I was startin my seventh grade in my new high school with a confident face I got some anxiety problems, I'm not exactly a constant case I get to my new school and hallways are always crowded as fuck, people still messin with me, don't you sluts got a dick to suck? I can't be around anyone, can't make friends, I quit now If anyone touches me I fucking swear I'll burn this shit down I get to my new class and and it is the same shit Except for that girl in the back, oh no, she's comin here, "what's your name", Shit She was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen "Hi, my.. my.. name is... ermm" Girls, there goes my clever gene "Haha, you're so cute!" Oh my god, my heart's racing "thanks, i guess... oh there's the bell" "see you later" amazing... Can't pay attention to the class, always thinkin about her I feel the tension like rays, I think she's winkin to me, sorta... My heart is like a fucking rollercoaster then it crashes I slowly die at home but in here in school I rise from the ashes We went to a field trip and she was flirting with me, obviously I was too oblivious to see, cuz I'm dumb around she, constantly She's an antisocial girl, doesn't have any friends Likes to provoke people, all eyes on her when she bends A "pale" tumblr user, talking shit 'bout everyboby She's actually nice to some people, but I doubt my memory Little did I know that she was talking shit in my face I would do crazy shit for you little girl, but now it's just too late... ------------- |
Posted By: The Butcher
Date Posted: 21 July 2014 at 10:01pm
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the only thing that i can see is you have a little lack in vocay and rhymes were kinda elementary. other then that it was decent. for audio this wouldnt be bad but like i said the vocab was a little lacking for text ------------- 
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Posted By: nigerchu
Date Posted: 21 July 2014 at 10:15pm
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Aight thanks for the feed butcher, let's see how it goes in audio
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Posted By: barrybondz
Date Posted: 22 July 2014 at 4:48am
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Not bad dj lol. [soundcloud]https://soundcloud.com/barrybondz-2/draft[/soundcloud] First rough draft im gonna practice this one for a day or so before I upload. ------------- |
Posted By: barrybondz
Date Posted: 22 July 2014 at 5:25am
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I don't quite get the ending lol. The closer needs to be like boom. I had quite a few personals shot at this retard who's now trying to dodge 1 min run time. ------------- |
Posted By: Pompus
Date Posted: 22 July 2014 at 5:40am
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@dj wait lol i kinda got it and i like where you're going with it, but yes perhaps differently worded |
Posted By: Pompus
Date Posted: 22 July 2014 at 6:03am
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oh lol! i see, well ok, yeah thats a lot funnier now |