Open Mic: Circus Runaways |
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The Law
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God of the Minions Joined: 15 June 2013 Status: Offline Points: 5504 ![]() Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 64-8-8 Form: LNWWWW |
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Topic: Circus RunawaysPosted: 24 January 2014 at 1:35pm |
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Chains
Vagabond status, I’m longing for a flask of Dom Magic wand wielder with gypsy spells tatted on… My acrobatic arms, flexible like flaccid schlongs Tightrope walker, did that over magma ponds Plastic bombs, yes, I was juggling them bitches With lovely ass assistants assisting me in matching thongs The chubbiest of midgets, I used them as my cannonballs Dancing on my abs, I called ‘em my lap-rechauns Court jester steezo, I’m the Charlie Chaplin don Most of my coworkers look like the cast of Spawn Saying 'Happy Kwanza' to the lions in their cage Them ring of flame jumpers entertaining Babylon Dapping up the tigers sparring with the mastodons As the crowds clapped along to most of our catchy songs… I passed batons & bags of chron’ to shackled moms… Of trapeze artists who would feel the wrath of Khan If they ever tried speaking on the ringmaster’s wrongs Troubadour exploiter who snatched me out the Amazon Had the god doing tricks, he had me running marathons Back in my younger days when I couldn’t last as long… As I do now, two thousand shows later Of making him mo’ paper I’m still a damn padawan To make things worse I fell in love with this catty broad Her captions spelled 'freak’ …written in a ratchet font Daddy's girl, very naughty Capricorn bragging 'bout... How her dad ran the jawn, a Mussolini renaissance I heard her body calling and yes you prolly guessed it I banged his daughter hard without the contraceptives He does not respect it, she’s like ‘poppa F-it!’ ‘This is my life and without him it is not as epic’ …Accept it! …I don’t think he got the message I think he’s tryna kill me…we gotta exit The Law A Circus Runaway, fleeing from a previous life Something like the ringling brothers tonight I started off as a clown, a hilarious task and worked my way around various acts Tightrope wonder, handling the line awesome Nickname.. Anakin the Sky-Walker Then after me came the trapeze and flyers Puppetry, Buffoonery, unicycles on the high wire The audience applaudes and cheers in planned accordance The ringmaster, Lawrence, announces the grand performance They carried out the tigers and the ring of fire Mr. Godiva with a chocolate laced attire Directed this beast into all sorts of poses and flips Had the audience in awe with the dosage of tricks. After the show ended, they trampeding to the exits We brought don't the tents, cleaned up the messes Loaded a train with the props and intertwined misfits Pulled out the alcohol, drunk and lifted spirits We all had a sleaze bag each and made our shaky decisions Mine was a contortionist, put her in all kinds of crazy positions. Another joke participant decided to woo the ring masters daughter Knew he was headed for slaughter, ditched the scene like a robber The hers and his life, that lonely bloke is truly dead Caught bad case of the circus romeo and juliet Everyone died fighting for the ownership that they wanted and since then this circus has been disrupted and haunted Ghostly ghouls scatter across air performing shit Fall from the trapeze at the stand byers recording it It's ironic they ran away from life, then gave up what they ran away from The hiding lifestyle of these lonely circus souls became to betray um.. Forever acting our part, a true career of it now and I was back where I start…. The "Tears of a Clown" |
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Kiki Spirez
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Joined: 30 December 2008 Location: Chesterfield Status: Offline Points: 4375 Crew: Kratos Kind Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 68-26-0 Form: WWWWLW |
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Posted: 24 January 2014 at 2:11pm |
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Both verses dope and eye catching.
CHAIN with the internals and awesome flow switch up. Law with the sick references and good narration. Favourite bits was CHAIN's opener, and the 'Sky-Walker' 'Tears of a Clown' Law references. Glad this came together. Props.
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Smoothtung
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Joined: 09 December 2012 Status: Offline Points: 2222 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 25-8-3 Form: WWWLWN |
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Posted: 24 January 2014 at 2:35pm |
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LOVE this idea folks.. man wish i was a part of it!
Law your verse was intricately put together and picked up more and more as the piece went on. Real nice man real nice. CHAIN? oh man, I've always called you one of my fav writers of all time. This verse bumps you up a spot.. idk, can we get higher than the moon?? Man, we have an underrated mother fucker in CHAIN.. Guys, awesome work here. Keep it up.
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Though you never even had the chance to witness it |
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Zinaii
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Joined: 15 June 2013 Status: Offline Points: 2957 Crew: Tha Syndicate Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 47-27-10 Form: WLNNNL |
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Posted: 24 January 2014 at 4:20pm |
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Whheewww chain you weave through those multis like a fuckin race track. Its like spot on not a syllable out of place. I havent read a ton of ur shit but i always know ppl always mention u as one of the best writers. From the opener to lap rechauns was dope as fuck. The way u put the two thousand shows later bar in there and still brought back the rhyme scheme without missing a beat? Super dope.
Law u kinda had a emotional vibe to yours specially wen u got into the loaded into the train wit misfits. I likd how the vibe got darker from there. The tears of a clown linr at the end was a dope way of cloaing it out. Ur a pretty good storyteller man just now starting to notice that from u Good drop both! One |
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-Que-
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Joined: 22 April 2010 Status: Offline Points: 2745 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 13-4-1 Form: WWWWLW |
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Posted: 24 January 2014 at 6:57pm |
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The Fonze!! Shittin on these OM's!! Dead @ Tight rope walker over magma ponds.......I said fuck it....Its over! That fuckin line was so beastly.
Law....I told you!! I fuckin told you! You got that flare for indepth topicals. Reminds me of a writer I knew "Thesis". The Skywalker line and the flyer multi set of bars that followed was clean bro. You kept that verse packed with vivid relatable imagery and never fell off topic. Yeah! Yall killed
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The Law
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God of the Minions Joined: 15 June 2013 Status: Offline Points: 5504 ![]() Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 64-8-8 Form: LNWWWW |
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Posted: 25 January 2014 at 2:29am |
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Appreciate all the feedback guys.
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The Law
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God of the Minions Joined: 15 June 2013 Status: Offline Points: 5504 ![]() Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 64-8-8 Form: LNWWWW |
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Posted: 27 January 2014 at 1:24pm |
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bump. Who voted this a 1 cause it was 5 stars, fucking prick.
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Lucky D
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Joined: 17 November 2008 Location: Canada Status: Offline Points: 1528 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 17-21-0 Form: WWLLLL |
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Posted: 27 January 2014 at 2:13pm |
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First off well done Law on keepin' up with Chain, that shits hard to do.
Like the concept it was carried out well for the most part. All in all Law your verse was well put together. Chains verse was dope also for the most part. Had everything ya were supposed to in verse, good vocab, detailed descriptions, multi's and interal rhymes also. The only part I really have to critic about is the last 6 lines or so. I get the whole fell in love with a Catty Broad, but to me you just seemed to force the last 6 lines in and they didn't really match up with the rest of the verse IMO. Other than that it was a tight verse.
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The Law
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God of the Minions Joined: 15 June 2013 Status: Offline Points: 5504 ![]() Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 64-8-8 Form: LNWWWW |
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Posted: 27 January 2014 at 5:01pm |
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Appreciate it lucky.
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CHAIN
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Joined: 14 November 2006 Status: Offline Points: 2769 ![]() Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 8-4-0 Form: LWWLWW |
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Posted: 30 January 2014 at 11:01pm |
![]() Appreciate you putting this together Law, and good looking out on the feed everyone @The Law, congratz on the top 10 spot. |
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