Battles under Review: diabolic lyrical joust#versafire vs doomsday |
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doomsday-carrier 
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Joined: 29 October 2013 Location: south africa Status: Offline Points: 39 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 0-2-0 Form: LL |
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 Topic: diabolic lyrical joust#versafire vs doomsdayPosted: 07 November 2013 at 2:35pm |
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house rules
5 bars 10 lines
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The VersaFire
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Posted: 07 November 2013 at 2:39pm |
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Want me to go first or you?
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doomsday-carrier
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Joined: 29 October 2013 Location: south africa Status: Offline Points: 39 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 0-2-0 Form: LL |
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Posted: 07 November 2013 at 2:51pm |
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verbally like thermometers spitting from a high degree, when I spit punches that will make you sweat more than mike Tyson at a spelling bee, as I stun cats, even if you masterbate against the wind you still wouldn't produce a come-back, while my rhymes to leave you purple, to confirm you been in more man holes than the ninja turtles, you can't enforce like a copless car, when my flow will confuse you more than a baby at a topless bar.
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doomsday-carrier
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Joined: 29 October 2013 Location: south africa Status: Offline Points: 39 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 0-2-0 Form: LL |
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Posted: 07 November 2013 at 2:54pm |
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sorry please understand learning the ropes I just dropped you can retaliate
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The VersaFire
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Posted: 07 November 2013 at 3:36pm |
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Expo: It Was Written is a album ruled the world is on it, Entai legendary fire pokeman, Kinte obviously Kunta Kinte, SSj4 means super saiyan Level 4
Dooms Day, challenging me was your first bad decision
Couldn't win even if you ruled the world like it was written
Yo bitch, I'll Carrier "carry her" home, give her the bone
And if you wanna fight i'll turn into Jon Jones
Wordplay Sensai, Spit Fire like Entai
No battle this a lyrical whippin, you Kinte
I'm not goin hard cuz I could easily Dissect ya
And Have you cryin on yo knees like you prayin to mecca
Beggin me to stop, so be glad im just chillen
Before I go SSJ4 and treat you like Krillin
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doomsday-carrier
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Joined: 29 October 2013 Location: south africa Status: Offline Points: 39 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 0-2-0 Form: LL |
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Posted: 07 November 2013 at 3:42pm |
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cool thanks you can take the win I messed up good battle much respect
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Arthur
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Joined: 23 August 2013 Location: London Status: Offline Points: 2319 Text Rank: #5 Stats: 36-7-0 Form: WWWWLL |
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Posted: 16 November 2013 at 7:56pm |
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Ok so it seems as though doomsday conceded lol wtf.
Anyway versafire did get the win but not as easily as the structure might suggest. Doomsday if yours was structured better it would have come off better. No punches from either battler had me impressed. A weak battle, you both have mad elevating to do. Work on the usuals, punches, personals and metaphors. There isn't much else for me to say really. I give this to versafire as he had a better structure and it was more of a battle verse. Winner: Versafire |
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-Que-
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Joined: 22 April 2010 Status: Offline Points: 2745 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 13-4-1 Form: WWWWLW |
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Posted: 16 November 2013 at 8:29pm |
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LOL...I like the whippin/Kuntah Kinte line....made me laugh.
Agreed with Art.....no impressive hits but you two had some jokes tho. I also cracked up at the baby/topless bar line. If nothing else you guy posses good humor. In time you will form powerful stingers. verbally like thermometers spitting from a high degree when I spit punches that will make you sweat more than mike Tyson at a spelling bee as I stun cats even if you masterbate against the wind you still wouldn't produce a come-back while my rhymes to leave you purple to confirm you been in more man holes than the ninja turtles you can't enforce like a copless car when my flow will confuse you more than a baby at a topless bar. Overall separating the lines...you had some funny content but the verse was all off. Dooms Day, challenging me was your first bad decision Couldn't win even if you ruled the world like it was writtenYo bitch, I'll Carrier "carry her" home, give her the bone And if you wanna fight i'll turn into Jon Jones Wordplay Sensai, Spit Fire like Entai No battle this a lyrical whippin, you Kinte I'm not goin hard cuz I could easily Dissect ya And Have you cryin on yo knees like you prayin to mecca Beggin me to stop, so be glad im just chillen Before I go SSJ4 and treat you like Krillin Better structure and flow definitely Ha!! This battle is so close it could go either way. If I was to judge on structure and flow...Vers would take this ...no question. If I judge on pure humor and potential...I would def vote Doomsday. I dunno what the rules are (if you can forfeit or not...gotta ask Scotty maybe) But if theres no such thing as forfeiting then Imma vote Doomsday. I think he had a better idea of punching imo. Verse, on the other hand , had the better structure, and was more smooth. So there we have it.....MVGT DOOM (unless his forfeit counts)
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AshleyKaos
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Posted: 18 November 2013 at 10:11am |
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ok dooms day you had some ok content but what the fuck yet agaon your structure ia horrible ook structure is the way you form your verse so its
cohesive and easy to read for the readeer and the concepts are clear, I.E ( exxample) [B]i see your posts notice you never get any feed back who would even bother,sorry to say but ya flows are wack[/B] ( BAD example but make each bar have a set up line and then have the next line be the punch line or vice versa ya dig? i thought vers obviously had the better flow shit was a land slide MVGT-versa |
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fuckoff
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Posted: 25 November 2013 at 5:11pm |
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doom, although the tyson line + baby/topless bar is so played its cliche , there was some funny wordplay. manholes was lol.
versa, there was no punchin/mockery really and read more like a random OM than a battle doom gmv
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Rapper T
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Posted: 04 December 2013 at 8:02am |
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TV had it going with the structure and the Pokemon, dragon ball z, begging and slavery
d-c had no structure, ninja turtles, police, babies and confusion Both need to direct attacks at your opponent with your words more through your whole battle, d-c there only started battling in the 3rd of his 4 lines. doom you gotta play on your opponents names and some dirt digging on your opponents could add more elements to your rhymes and you gotta follow the rules ... MVGT TV 3-2 |
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shift8
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Posted: 04 December 2013 at 12:28pm |
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Thanks to -Que- for breaking doomsday-carrier's verse into lines! doomsday-carrier: I actually really liked some of your punch lines, pretty funny stuff. Some of your set-up/filler was a bit nonsensical, though. The ninja turtle and closer were your best lines. The VersaFire: your verse structure was much better than doomsday-carrier's, but I don't think your punch lines were quite as funny or hard-hitting. Overall, it is a decision between the stronger flow (The VersaFire) and the stronger punch lines (doomsday-carrier), and I think I have to go with the punch lines in this instance. My vote would go to doomsday-carrier. |
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The VersaFire
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Posted: 08 December 2013 at 9:18pm |
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3-3 upps
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Nigma
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Joined: 25 March 2013 Location: Canada Status: Offline Points: 4078 Crew: Elision   |
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Posted: 08 December 2013 at 9:26pm |
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Dooms verse was bitten.
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DressToKill
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Joined: 27 June 2006 Location: Canada,New Brunswick Status: Offline Points: 6876 Crew: Lyricist Inc. Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 78-62-0 Form: LLWWWL |
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Posted: 08 December 2013 at 10:48pm |
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Hey hot shot, next time do you mind keeping the title "name vs name"
Thx |
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The original comeback kid
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The VersaFire
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Joined: 06 November 2013 Location: St. Louis Status: Offline Points: 271 Crew: Hunger Games Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 3-6-0 Form: LWLLWW |
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Posted: 08 December 2013 at 11:03pm |
You talking to me lol?
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doomsday-carrier
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Joined: 29 October 2013 Location: south africa Status: Offline Points: 39 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 0-2-0 Form: LL |
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Posted: 19 December 2013 at 2:22pm |
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pls explain the bitten verse comment
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DressToKill wrote: