Identity crisis: IC Semi-Finals: Battler 2 vs Battler 3

Battler 2 no showed.

First off, huge respect to Law...picked two really different but equally tough topics for the semi final. Awesome work.

The challenge with this one is that it's so specific, there's no surprise in the events...although there is obviously the big mystery about what happened, which I guess is why it's so captivating as a story in this era of constant & instant information.

So yeah, I get that it's tough but if I'm honest I don't think you did a great job on this one & in some respects you're maybe a little lucky to get through to the final off the back of this verse (although in another sense you aren't, you tried to tackle a very difficult topic bringing an unique angle in & the other person bottled it / wasn't up to that challenge). Personally I think the topic was screaming out for a verse from the pilots perspective...or maybe like verses from 2/3 people aboard and showing their perspective. That was the way to try and have that creative spin on it, for me. What you ended up doing was trying to add a bit of intrigue in about a passengers personal circumstance which didn't really work for me, then a kind of pointless segment on boarding the plane...the next part was cool, good writing & liked that philosophical approach & metaphor content but seemed really irrelevant to the plot line. Don't really get why you put that in there from a story point of view. The segment on the actual on board action was well written, liked it, but ultimately you've written 14 lines that was on topic & you've gone pretty cliche on "not my child!?"...think you're going to need to push the envelope a bit more in the final if you want to have a chance. Last section I didn't really like either, again, struck me as a bit uncreative to close off with a "conversation with God"...it's pretty much like the standard "let's kill the narrator" spin.

Basically, I didn't like the way you approached the topic...in terms of the actual technical side / style of writing this was a good verse...very cleanly written, good linguistic skills in there and not overdone, was a mature blend. But I think you struggled both in narrative and character development which are pretty critical pieces you need to bring.

I guess what I don't know is how quickly you wrote this in...if it's a "fuck, I need to get a verse in" and you've just rattled off something without really thinking about the story of it, fair enough, there's a lot of good fundamentals in there. If this is something more thought through then I think you need to go back to the drawing board next time around. But hey, look on the bright side...at least you've lived to fight another day & everyone needs a little luck to get to a tourney final!

Ur story was really nice ,Imagery was nice as I could feel the words u wrote,The only prob IMO was with rhymes clot/God,Close/For etc didn't work fo me
I know the the after 'Son' verse had multies but try and make ur rhymes more complex...;)