Heat Wave: HW Topical (Rd 1) - Exoduzt v Rapper T

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   "Headline round" - This round, battlers will be given a random newspaper headline and will have to write the "article" that goes with it in rap format.

Battle C "Headline Battle": Jellyfish Apocalypse Not Coming

Best of 3 votes from JUDGES

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Cuba Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Moderator Legendary Assassin Joined: 14 June 2004 Location: England Status: Offline Points: 12332 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 47-22-0 Form: WWWWLW	Post Options Post Reply Quote Cuba Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Topic: HW Topical (Rd 1) - Exoduzt v Rapper T Posted: 16 July 2015 at 9:32pm
	"Headline round" - This round, battlers will be given a random newspaper headline and will have to write the "article" that goes with it in rap format. Battle C "Headline Battle": Jellyfish Apocalypse Not Coming Best of 3 votes from JUDGES


Cuba Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Moderator Legendary Assassin Joined: 14 June 2004 Location: England Status: Offline Points: 12332 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 47-22-0 Form: WWWWLW	Post Options Post Reply Quote Cuba Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 16 July 2015 at 9:33pm
	Exoduzt 3 poisonous Jelly fish were captured in the local bay... We tried to make them go away, it was a disaster when they chose to stay... Two children dead rite where they were told to play... No hope today as they died and were left so cold with frozen frames... Man vs Nature now who are we suppose to blame?... We Point & aim our fingers but could this be natures calling... The death rates alarming as mother natures faith is falling... But further tests prove that this wasn't there natural habitat... So they were deliberately placed, now can you imagine that?... The tragic facts of this bad impact is something we need to run faster at... Theres a mad man with a bad plan that uses nature as his weapon... this is not a normal school of fish so I hope your bracing for this lesson... Theres traces of deception as we wait to see his face when hes arrested... Everyone can look at the crime scene and they will be facing their reflection... The water is like glass when its disturbed it can break with an aggression... Sorta like my patience because this case is still neglected...


Cuba Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Moderator Legendary Assassin Joined: 14 June 2004 Location: England Status: Offline Points: 12332 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 47-22-0 Form: WWWWLW	Post Options Post Reply Quote Cuba Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 16 July 2015 at 9:35pm
	Rapper T The scientists peered in the deep with their scopes where the other species appeared to be frequenting most Seen as if ghosts, waters pulse and throng with life - unquantified numbers of cultures are on the rise... It wasn't wise to destroy them or kill 'em with force They'd only multiply and begin to fill up the shores "Isn't it awesome?" One researcher asked - surely fresh As the whole team studiously watched the whirly mess Through the murky depths seeing them clogging pipes Swarming phenomenally obviously this wasn't right! "No", said the proctor guy, "this is most horrible, these so called animals are becoming apocalyptical - capsizing nauticals and destroying nuclear reactors, wiping out salmon, turtles, albatross and mackerels." "Not that at all", said the noob who hoped he'd say that shit, "I mean that humans said us jellyfish COULDN'T take over the planet..."


Nigma Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Site Moderator Joined: 25 March 2013 Location: Canada Status: Offline Points: 4078 Crew: Elision	Post Options Post Reply Quote Nigma Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 20 July 2015 at 10:25pm
	Exo, quality opener. Really enjoyed that. The line with children dying right where they were told to play was my favorite line in your verse. The wording and meaning behind it was awesome. Contained sadness that they were doing what they were suppose to and died regardless. Towards your ending I thought this verse was gonna be a grand slam, 3/4 of the way through I began reading faster as I thought you were going to have some crazy shit happen or the person to blame revealed but it wasn't as great as it coulda been IMO.. But at the same time accomplishing all of that in 16 lines is damn near impossible. Still a good quality verse, especially the first quarter. Rapper T, I was really impressed by most of this verse. Your use of interesting and to the point vocabulary was some of the best I've seen from you. Your first 5 bars were well written, but I feel the verse went downhill very fast in the last quarter. Looking at the verse overall, the biggest catastrophe was that it seemed like you mis-read the topic.. It was suppose to be about the Jellyfish Apocalypse NOT coming. Aside from that, your second to last line was the most harmful to the verse. It was extremely colloquial, did not fit with the rest, and through things off at the closer, one of the most important times to not throw things off. This was leaps and bounds closer than I thought it would be but I give it the vote to Exo for a more on topic verse with higher high points and fewer low points +1 Exoduzt


iLL ScriptureZ Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Standard Member Joined: 13 May 2014 Location: NJ Status: Offline Points: 2477 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 11-5-1 Form: LWWLWW	Post Options Post Reply Quote iLL ScriptureZ Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 22 July 2015 at 8:57pm
	Exoduzt you really have a fluidity about how you create your verses. Much different then your punchline drops. The ease of which the internals mix with the externals and still give relevance to the piece, or, add descriptive characteristics to a piece is very pleasing as a reader. It makes the delivery of the content smooth and comfortable to grasp. You had a very strong verse. Rapper T, you had a nice vocabulary and truthfully you had some solid topical bars. You stayed on topic, and you had a understand of what you were writing. The descriptive parts of your were pretty decent. The story on the other hand fell flat. The researchers studying the apocalyptic like behavior of the jellyfish, and call me crazy, but did you just say a noob turned into a human jellyfish? Lost me at that point. I get the far fetched reality and a nice story plot twist, but this was one and not the other. Exoduzt with the win.

Cuba Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Moderator Legendary Assassin Joined: 14 June 2004 Location: England Status: Offline Points: 12332 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 47-22-0 Form: WWWWLW	Post Options Post Reply Quote Cuba Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 30 July 2015 at 6:12pm
	Exo advances to round 2 and will face the winner of J Brenn v Mission