LA Magazine: The May LA Alternative Awards

Greetings LA. And welcome to the second alternative monthly awards hosted by me, Arthur. In these awards, don’t expect to find us giving props for dope verses or shout outs for great work. There are going to be some returning awards that featured in last month’s addition and I’ll be handing out some brand new awards too. In this edition we’re giving out a total 10 awards for the month of May. I will be awarding 9 and we’ll have a very special guest giving out a 10^th award of his choice. These, are the Alternative Awards. Let’s get to it then…

 

Ok, so here’s the link first of all: http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/good-luck-ep-ii-ak-the-genesis_topic42776.html. So I’ll let you decide for yourself, is Ch3kkgame’s feed brutally honest? Or real harsh? Either way, when I read it my reaction was “oh my fucking god”. I won’t say much else, as it’s down to personal preference, but it’s certainly my pick for OMG moment of the month.

 

“Quiet class, quiet class… now first one to shout out the right answer wins a cookie… now, what is a search tool?” If that was a real situation, Key3 would win zero cookies. Because he decided to take to the Hip Hop Chit Chat section to post this gem http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/deconstructing-lyrics_topic42800.html. Wow! What an amazing video! I hear you all shout. And yes it’s a cool vid, the trouble is, it was already posted 3 days earlier by Endeavor… here http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/rapping-deconstructed_topic42789.html. Here’s an idea, maybe we check if something has already been posted before being so hasty and posting it ourselves… good idea? No? oh ok let’s just post everything over and over, have it your way.

 

So JBrenn hit the 10 year mark on the 3^rd of May 2016. I’ve only been on the site a few years, but I regard JBrenn as one of the most genuine guys on the site. As a newbie, he was one of the first established members to reach out to me and offer advice and invite me in to his crew. So let’s raise our glasses for to JBrenn on his 10 year milestone.

 

I mean really? You made your own birthday thread? Did you bake your own cake too? Send yourself a card in the mail? What presents did you get yourself? Come on son, what a fucking social faux pas that shit is. I needn’t say much more, the thread kind of speaks for itself. Those wanting to wish “Endeeze” (lets hope that nickname doesn’t catch on) a happy birthday are more than welcome to here… though it would be belated as fuck. http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/congratulations-endeeze_topic42832.html

 

This was quite an easy one to award. Droidian has hit the battlefield hard right off the bat, he’s been dropping good votes on almost every battle that’s available to vote on. He’s entered into his first tournament tagging with Rutter in an attempt to capture his first title, the LA Tag Team title. He has become part of the most active crew on the site, EMPIRE, and has already earned himself a battle record of 4 wins and 1 loss. All within the space of 1 month. If new members need a blueprint on how to be successful when joining LA, well Droidian has set a very good example.

 

Once again they have retained their spot as the top moderating team. We recognised their efforts last month by awarding them the Moderating Team of the Month for May and as they just keep getting better and better it will come as no shock that this team of sheer studs has won the award for the second month in a row. Keep it up guys, you are an inspiration to all moderating teams worldwide.

 

So on the 17^th of May Sykonaut took to the introductions page to, well, introduce himself to the site. “Yeah, what’s the big deal?” I hear you ask. Well, it was the way he introduced himself, he said (and I quote): “My friends call me Syko, well they would if I had friends... Sniff sniff”. Erm, hands up who did a peoples eyebrow. If you would like to offer Sykonaut some positive vibes, his introduction thread can be found here: http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/um-hi-well-this-is-awkward_topic42771.html

 

So Sky Scrapur made a new thread in the Pictures & Graphics section requesting for one of our many artists to hook him up with a sig. He even took the time to find a nice little picture… of… a… microphone. No prizes for originality. Anyway, needless to say nobody made his sig. Come on guys, I know there’s a good person out there, somewhere. Let’s start the campaign to get this sig made! Fuck it, I’ll give an award next month for the best sig made using his little microphone picture. #GetSkyScrapursSigMade. Thread is here: http://www.lyricalassault.co.uk/forum/sky-needs-a-sig-anyone-who-can-help_topic42821.html

 

Young D took to the General Board to make a thread regarding the chat. Which in itself is already annoying as there is already a thread regarding the chat. But this award isn’t just for the thread, no no my friends, this award is for the reason in which he gave to seek out a quick chat. Apparently guys, “shottin is boring”. For my American friends, the term “shottin(g)” relates to the selling of drugs. And it seems it’s a boring… job? (if you wanna call it that).

 

And we finish with our Special Guest Award, the special guest is none other than Neek. Here is the award he decided to give out…

 

If you go back to the BR#2 predictions thread it was mentioned that Trizzy Tre has a 'history' of being a slave to his setup. Everything he does lyrically is based around it and if you have a knack for schemes and word placement it’s an easy spot. This historic blunder however, is more to the lack of research for said predictable pattern. "Ruts not an Animal if he 'fear-a-Con' (Farrakhan) still don't make him a Black Panther!" - Trizzy Tre in his most recent tag verse with Art. Huh? Louis Farrakhan is a member of the nation of Islam and not the black panthers. I get that hes a civil rights icon, but there is zero direct correlation between the two. The nation of Islam is for enlightenment through spiritual meanings. Whereas the panthers were started and formed as a militant group. Both serve a purpose of dealing with oppression, but in entirely different methods. It’s like relating Christianity and militia. So this is definitely the "History" fail of the month. In the words of Shawn Carter, what... you tryna kick knowledge?

 

 

So there it is folks, the LA Alternative Awards for May. Join me again next month for, hopefully, another 10 awards to give out for the month of June. If you want to give out the special guest award, send your ideas to my pm box and if you give your award a good write up I’ll consider it. Until next time, remember, shottin is boring, stay in school kids. Arthur.